Sos I have no one to talk to

My therapist said why do you come to a mental health center if you don’t think you have a mental health problem? And I realized that I don’t know why I go there because I don’t think I have an mental health issue, it’s the government is a conspiracy and they are out to get me. It’s because my therapist said don’t come if you don’t think it’s a mental health problem. But now I am off my meds and the little blue happy. I’m having such a hard time and I don’t know who to talk to because my mentor and friends will be angry that I went off my meds

That is very dangerous advice for a therapist to give you. Schizophrenics almost never have insight to their illness after the first psychotic episode. The lack of insight is around 97%.

So in short, you are not well, but you think you are well. There is no government conspiracy, it’s in your head. You are not a targeted individual, you are hallucinating the victimhood.

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It seemed kind of ■■■■■■ up what he said. I don’t get why he said it. I’ve been hospitalized 5 times now and he kept asking why I thought I was in the psych ward if I didn’t have a mental health problem. I can’t get it out of my head because I feel like I don’t belong in a psych ward but every time I go off my meds I end up there. He is throwing me off am I crazy?

What do I do? He’s always confronting me about conflicting opinions and it makes me crazy - he kept asking like why are you here if you don’t have a mental health problem, and stop coming if you don’t think you have one and stuff idk it just really confused me and now I didn’t take my meds last night and spent all night in the closet

No, he’s not. I have Kaiser so he’s a therapist through there but I trusted him up till yesterday and now I’m not sure if I should trust him or not

In your shoes I would restart the meds (don’t double dose, just skip the doses you missed) and talk to him about how you definitely need the meds, since every time you stop them you end up in the ward.

It’s just confusing because I don’t think I’m ill, people tell me I am but I think it’s a government conspiracy against me and I’m just caught in the crossfire of the FBI and I just feel really confused

Eventually you will develop insight that your brain is not well, and is merely inventing all that government conspiracy evidence.

Notice how you can’t document any of it in a meaningful, intelligent way. That’s because your brain is making up a story by putting pieces together that only make sense to you.

how do you develop insight? My brain is making it up?! Why would my brain turn against me like that

When the brain is stressed out due to some form of physical damage (stress or drug induced), it struggles to find an explanation for the stress in the environment. If the damage-induced stress is chronic, the brain makes an ongoing “crazy narrative” to explain the stress to your conscious mind, that persists until the stress is alleviated.

@naturallycured Ok so update… I emailed my therapist and was like ok I feel like you’re telling me to go off my meds or not come back and he said no you misunderstood, the questions were just rhetorical. Does that seem like a good explanation?!

You’re not the first person to have these problems. You need to take your meds. Once you’re stabilized than work on your problems with a therapist. Hopefully, a different one.

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The therapist should not have been rhetorical with a sensitive schizophrenic. We are an overly trusting type.

That was my thought too. What kind of therapist says “yeah you know if you don’t think you have a mental health issue then don’t come back, why take your meds?” Like um… am I the right person to be the judge of that?! And he said the questions were rhetorical but the damage has been done.

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I’m a schizophrenic who sometimes was known for my insight.

Insight is not an all or nothing phenomenon. Rather it came to me in bits and bytes.

One night in frustration, I said to my Mom, “Why do I have to take all these meds?”

And she said, “Well for one thing, it’ll help you sleep better.”

In a moment of self-honesty, I realized I wasn’t sleeping right and hadn’t been sleeping right for a long time.

Good wishes,

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@77nick77 @naturallycured Guys can we maybe be a little more careful about telling people to stop getting treatments from mental health professionals? I know this seems bad, but we have little info and the default response should not be “stop seeing them”.

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