So, I started class last week. I’m studying Tradicional Chinese Medicine, and it’s a lot of work. New concepts to learn, and anatomy, biology, and a lot of other classes that are fun but a lot of work.
At first I was scared for two reasons, first I don’t want to dwell on delusional and magical thinking so I was worried the course wouldn’t be based on a scientific approach - but it is, and I’m very happy about it. Was also scared about not being able to do it, still am a little bit, it’s a five year degree and it’s a lot of hard work, envolving having to study every day, which I’m not used to at all.
After years of just working, after one year of complete depression, confined to the small apartment I share with my mom now, and not thinking it was possible to ever feel joy again, I’m doing it!
Started a studying group, we’re going to meet every week. Started a studying schedule, that I have to keep up with if I am to have good grades.
Good things that are happening:
Not only am I sociable and fun to be around, already made some friends and get along with everyone really well. It’s a good class, all the folks are cool people with interesting backgrounds and a lot less prejudice than what I was used to.
The teachers are all pretty cool, and helpful. There is an office to support the student if the student is having troubles with all the classes, I might go to it if I’m feeling overwhelmed.
Also, I thought it was going to be a lot harder to understand stuff, with cognitive decline and all, but I’m starting to understand every thing and enjoying the classes.
So what I’m here to say is that is possible. I was such in a dark place a few months ago, and now I’m climbing out of it and doing something I love.
It is possible to be happy even with symptoms folks. Never forget that.
It’s going to be a hard battle, because I still struggle with some symptoms and I want to make sure I don’t leave work behind.