Scared…TW?

Unusual Beliefs
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It’s all happening like they said it would. I’m seeing the connections and signs. I’m scared of what I keep seeing, scared of what I believe it all to mean.

Dreams feel prophetic, breaking news feels like dry history in a book, a sense of “Of course it did”. We’re screwed, and I feel like other people can’t see it.

Doesn’t feel real as I check further and further out. It’s like I’ve got spoilers to the last episode of a bad simulation style show, maybe a game.

Uncontrolled thoughts, and transient voices, nightmares, and ruminations. I’m tired, I’m scared, and I feel like there’s nothing I can do to help stop it. I can’t even slow it down from its whiplash pace.

I’m craving drugs, I’m craving an escape, I’m craving things that should frighten me. I’m craving a beautiful lie that it’s all going to be ok.

So what do I do? Just wait? Just watch?

Whispers of taking a dark path somehow echo and cascade. Like debris burning up on re-entry. Divine light burning me away.

Soul feels tired, and everlasting life in its name sounds like a curse. Gods to ascend. New heights to soar. More fun to fall from greater and greater heights.

I don’t want to be right, I pray I’m not, but this is going to get worse.

It’s almost time, and I’m not ready….

:llama:

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Reach out to your medical team - you’re decompensating. Get help before your insight goes completely. (((hugs)))

:frowning:

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It’s good you recognize the signs this is our illness. Please reach out to your therapist and or Dr.

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Was going to say something similar to Velociraptor. You definitely sound like you need some outside help. Reach out to the necessary professionals to keep yourself grounded. Hate to see a post from you like this. Your posts are usually very funny and entertaining. Not used to a post like this from you. Hope to see you back in a good place soon.

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Can you explain? I also see terrible signs, but even normies do, and probably for good reason. The 1930s provides a good example of a historical period when the real world, with its politics and economics colluded with what can only be described as a spiritual catastrophe. A darker stage of antisocial anomie might be approaching. Take care of yourself.

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I agree with the others. You could lose insight, and then you’ll be in trouble. Call your medical team @Ooorgle

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Angel voices, and bothersome spirits. They would bother me a lot unmedicated, seem to be back some now.

I’ll stay safe.

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Thank you all, I’ll leave a message to my team for an earlier appointment if possible. I really don’t want clozapine, and I’m hoping this passes, but you’re all right I should call.

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Left a message with my Therapist for put me on a canceled appointment list to see if I can get in earlier.

I took my PRN this morning, and slept for almost 4 hours. Fiancée will be home soon.

I’ll be cool.

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Never heard about that… interesting, didn’t know that was the term for something similarly experienced.

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The world is dystopian in my opinion ---- Thwaites glacier may melt in three to 5 years, war in Eastern Europe, the world economy controlled by crazy private banks, a pandemic that was probably made in a lab…etc…Love your writing/ prose though… Keep being artistic. The world needs more people like YOU!!!

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