Say anything here

Can I pet your dog?

People on this forum donā€™t usually write or interact with me on posts forum nor reply my questions or interact with me .
Not interested in private chatting as itā€™s in appropriate I think for me.
A touch if I open a thread perhaps.
I donā€™t think I fit in to any cultures ,religions or communities it seems .
Itā€™s always been that way.
Beyond outsider.
Exclusion ignoring isolation attack
I think Iā€™ll stay around the forum anyway.

Hope you are well and I think itā€™s good to see your profiles anyway.

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Hey @SacredNeigh7 ! How are you doing? :slight_smile:

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I had a happy day but I am sad at this precise moment because I am thinking I want to be a Father, but there is not consent, I mean I can not find a Mother for my possible child. I do not know what you think, but my biological clock is telling me ā€œthisā€ for a long time, I like children and one of my dreams is to be a Father.

Hi there everhopeful!
Thank you for saying hi to me.:blush:
Hope you are well.
I am well thank you.
A bit hyped up etc in mind n worried about my horse :horse:etc but coping through it and I think latuda is activating for me .
I was on olanzapine which seems more calming,settling ,stable etc but Iā€™m on latuda now.
If I have difficulties I donā€™t feel Iā€™m coping with I might get back on olanzapine.

We made piroger for dinner tonight with potato bake and sallad.:heart:ļø

It was a very nice dinner.

Hope you enjoyed dinner also.

Ciao for now!

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Maybe you will meet a good woman.
Kind regards n good wishes to you.

@Dreamy first of all, being a father is overrated in a big way.
Second, there is absolutely no need for you to be a biological father in order to raise kids,
there is no relation imo between who is biological parent and who raises the child.
Third, in the future women wonā€™t be required all to have kids, not the female womb and not even the female egg.

I have this memory of being a toddler and a woman holding me down while her husband raped me and me screaming for my real father who was watching and locked in a gorilla cage with gorillas and he could not help me.

I was in hospital after that incident.
Drs said trauma had happened n I couldnā€™t breath or talk or tell anyone.

Another memory when I was bit older around seven and father who is not my real father penetrated me n said if you love me you wonā€™t scream.
Disgusting.
His not my real father.
Thank god.

Iā€™ve been trying to break all contact with him for years but was staying in touch for grandma but now sheā€™s dead I tried again but then he says Iā€™m psychotic n unwell n do psychology on me n blame me for everything n they say Iā€™m a lier but Iā€™m not .

The mum one tried to kill me.
She had psycho moments maaaan.
But I love her n I think she loves me reluctantly too.
She was alone with me for years n working n driving two hours to work sometimes in old car :red_car: so understand that difficult.

I donā€™t stand a chance against them all .
Me alone n them educated n blaming me for things not my fault.

Great to be adult .

I only have contact with the one they said was my father on x mas n birthdays I send a card.
Nothing else.
I want to break all contact with his family but they are linked to the woman who raised me n gave me place to live etc so I not ready how to do that.

:heart:ļø

I swear that man is not my real father.

My real father is great.
Blessed he be.
I miss him n he says hi to me in spirit.

Even memories of being molested as s baby.

Anyway,I donā€™t think about it.

No one believes me anyway instead they all blamed me.

I had roast duck for dinner

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Poor duck, she had 6 babies her name was daffy R.I.P

I found out that I keep pursuing ways to make myself feel happy. Happiness is the motivation, no matter it is as simple as coffee beverage, or window shopping, or spending time browsing the web forum. What do you do to feel happy? After all, happiness is the ultimate goal of every religions on earth.

thank you. They are the most soothing.

Putting ice cubes in oven when baking bread is a delight that can make the crust crispy n taste great.

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I really have to get my butt in gear, been slacking for a week now

I feel like Iā€™ve got the energy to do something. But I donā€™t want to do anything. The brainā€™s a funny thing.

Iā€™ll spend a few days at home before I start a new job after Easter. I intend to tidy up home. If I donā€™t do that now, it is unlikely I would do that anyhow.

So I will get up tomorrow looking at the stuff and repeat everyday.

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Itā€™s Aliveā€¦ :stuck_out_tongue:

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:skull_crossbones::coffin::crying_cat_face: