Say Anything H is for Hamburgers

so decided not to schedule any activities during my daily free time, i will just do whatever i please, which will most likely be come here and sit on the couch haha.

I’m not doing well, again. It’s very mixed mood.

I took 2mg Clonazepam (max dose recommend by pdoc). I’m feeling slowed down, from the Clonazepam, but I still feel chaotic in my head and I’m tempted to cut my hair.

I also feel depressed, ATM, like just sad. Thinking of self harm. I want someone to come over to my house and hang out with me, but nobody is available. I feel hopeless.

My youngest brother said he might come over, but that usually means he won’t…

I feel out of my mind. I need company. I can’t wait for hubby to get home.

Why am I like this? I’m on an AP & a mood stabilizer. High doses, too.

My pdoc appointment got moved to this Thursday, in the morning. That’s good, at least.

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Hang in there OcelotKitty. I hope you can get someone to come over and keep you company.

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I like this color best of all I’ve seen you with.

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Maybe you could utilize the 24/7 hotlines like the suicide hotlines. The mods might have a good number to call. @rogueone @anon4362788 @Ninjastar @Moonbeam

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If you are feeling suicidal or having a mental health crisis, please tell someone — a friend or family member, a teacher, a doctor or therapist or call 911 (if you’re in the U.S.) or the Emergency Medical Services phone number in your country.

You can also call a crisis intervention hotline—these are available in the U.S. and in many other countries. You do not need to be actively suicidal to benefit from a crisis hotline.

International crisis hotlines:

Crisis hotlines in the U.S.:

More resources:

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If it’s not one thing it’s another :rage:

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@Bowens , @Michigan , @rogueone

Thanks, guys.

I called my youngest brother and explained what was going on. He said he will come over in an hour or two; he just has some work and school stuff he has to finish.

In the meantime, I think I’ll call a crisis line to help get me though until later

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got naked and checked myself out in the mirror yesterday, i think i look damn sexy at 162 pounds. up 2 more pounds, i put on a couple pounds a week it seems. anyways, i’ll remember this and maybe go back to 160 pounds in the future, but now i want to get up to 180 or 190 pounds and look like my bald hero rex burkhead haha. who is nfl running back, but he weighs 215 pounds an is an inch taller than me.

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When does hubby get home?

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I shaved myself and looked twenty years younger, body hair btw

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About 5:30pm, give or take. It’s 2:03pm, now.

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Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Congrats I’m so happy for you haha goood job

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Some of my books came in today that’s maybe less than half

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Something is off. I’m unfocused, restless, overly chatty but at the same time don’t want to talk.
I’m anxious and depressed.

I feel incredibly frustrated.

I just want to hide in a tight space and breathe with my head in my hands

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Just finished psych appointment, doctor wants me to try 8.75mg Zyprexa. 10mg gave me akathisia, 7.5 no akathisia but voices still present, he wants me to cut the 2.5’s and take a half of one with my main pill to see if we can help with the voices more without triggering the akathisia.

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I’m painting my nails, which was recommended by the crisis line person.

I feel a little better. My toes look less ugly. They’re “Tiger Blossom” color, which is like a pinkish-orange!!

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i said h is for habanero :hot_pepper: ! i demand my money back! haha

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I love it when you say ‘oh,well’ in your posts

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Well my doctor appointment went well. My cholesterol was crap from the last blood test though so the doc wants to try me on a different cholesterol med.

And I weigh 270 pounds now. :open_mouth:

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