Safety Tips Everyone Should Follow

Creativity
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  1. Don’t make love to porcupines
  2. Don’t have sex with lions
  3. Don’t try to be Superman by attempting to be bulletproof or leaping over tall buildings in a single bound.
  4. Don’t take a vacation to Syria
  5. Don’t date a serial killer
  6. Don’t take a diuretic at bedtime
  7. Don’t binge on prunes
  8. Don’t write on Facebook that you want to do something illegal
  9. Don’t have sex with your siblings
  10. Don’t put your tongue on a metal post when it’s really cold.
  11. Don’t fart into fire
  12. If you watch an old episode of Beavis and Butthead don’t do what they do.
  13. Don’t tell anyone in America who you are voting for in the next election.
  14. If you are a straight male don’t run around naked in a bathhouse.
  15. Don’t mess with the religious leaders, the mafia, the gay community, or Russian President Putin. It will be an ugly result. And the way things are going you may need to be careful how you act towards the President in the US if you are there because I’m not sure about how things will be somewhere down the road. He may someday have more power than you think.
    This message is brought to you by the Upyours Safety Council.
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Can I get an exemption for number 11?

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