She took plan B after a night in Atlantic City, when there was an extra room she had that i didn’t know about, and was 5 days late on her period. I’ve been dating her for 4 years now and discovered this when she was panicking to her friends about it.
The only reason she gives for lying is “I didn’t want you to worry” which is eh… but something in my gut tells me no, because plenty of exes of mine have taken plan b and none of them lied or hid it for months and also my response would be “taking plan b is the right thing to do”. I wouldn’t be worried bc I’ve been in the situation several times before.
She admits 100% LYING isn’t okay, especially in a relationship and that she shouldn’t have lied or hid it. I ask her why she actively lied and hid or thought “I’d be worried” and immediately gets loud, starts accusing, calls her friend who then gives another reason that’s different than hers for the lie.
And trust me many psychologists, counselors (including my own), and philosophers will tell you lying is generally bad and not the best style of achieving a healthy relationship especially when you’re already in a long term relationship.
I don’t usually get paranoid out of nowhere just about one specific thing, with my current diagnosis it’s questionable to be on this site
These are my questions:
Being her bf of 4 years, is it my business to ask why she wouldn’t tell me she took plan b, when she admitted lying about it was completely wrong (her exact words)? …If it is actually my business and not someone else’s?
Is “I was afraid you’d be worried and I care about you” a reasonable excuse for not telling her bf of 4 years? Am I being paranoid for politely asking her to tell me more when all I get is “bc I care about you” or “bc you’d be worried”?
I think that’s everything, I messed up explaining in the last post, end of story. Please give opinions and help me find closure to this situation, I only have so much valium