Questioning my decision to go off meds. Help

I’m anxious thinking about going back on meds but I don’t know why entirely. The idea over whelms me. I stopped because it wore off a week before my injection and I went psychotic and Isk if I still am or not, I do believe I am dead still but I am not hallucinating anymore. Haven’t for a few days. I also believed that demons want me to take meds, and everyone trying to get me back on is a demon. This idea doesn’t cross my mind anymore, but I’m just as anxious about it. I am getting daily mood swings . Yesterday I woke up hyper and ready to go, even was dancing at work and just really happy. Then 3 hours into my shift.my mood tanks for NO reason. Woke up this morning depressed, slowly became manic.

I’m clear enough that I should probably get back on meds, but I’m having panic attacks just thinking about it.

Did you tell your Dr how you’re doing off meds?

I haven’t seen my Dr I don’t trust her not to be a demon.

I just now started questioning my decision to go off meds so I haven’t wanted to see her

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I’ve been thinking you need to go to the hospital for a while.

I understand you have a dog and have trouble finding care for it while you’re gone, right?

Is that the only thing keeping you from going?

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I was making excuses at the time, I could have gone, not super easily but I had offers to watch her. But now it’s financial since I missed so many days at work and can’t afford to miss more for a while. I could schedule it, but it would have tk wait a couple weeks.

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I think if you can manage getting care for your dog and won’t get evicted if you don’t have income for a couple weeks,

You should go to the hospital.

Not being hateful at all,

But you’ve not been well in a while.

It’s time to get the help you need.

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I would get evicted if I missed that many days. :confused: but my stays tend to be 4 or 5 days. I could miss that and be fine if I scheduled my days off around it. I only work 3 days a week.

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I’ve been to the hospital and only had to stay a few days.

I say it’s worth the gamble.

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I haven’t been well since April. Then may 18 (when my ex threatened suicide and attacked me and punched a hole in the door)absolutely tore me up. Then I had to file a protective order , see her in court and listen to her accuse me of abuse, I moved to a new city and my job situation got way worse here, I live in a sketchy neighborhood with a dirty ass roommate. It’s just… a lot and it’s all hitting me right now.

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It is a lot.

You’re coping with a lot more than usual.

You could use a few days away from everything to collect your thoughts and make some plans.

I still say go to the hospital.

Not trusting people because you think they are demons is serious.

And it’s keeping you from getting proper care.

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Yeah, I agree that you need some kind of help. Whether that is contacting your doctor and going back on meds or going to the hospital I don’t know, but I agree you need to take some steps to get you back into reality.

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I’m psychosis has honestly been getting better than it was last week but my mood changes have been debilitating

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I think I’m just gonna force myself to go tomorrow. I will only be missing a day or two of work most likely if I do.

I’m panicking thinking about going. What if they’re demons? My entire routine will be thrown off too.

They’re not demons.

Thinking they are is definitely a sign you should go now.

The more you let this sit in your mind, you’ll talk yourself out of it.

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I cant go until my dad gets off work tomorrow at 4, he’s picking up my dog

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The very reason you need to be on meds.

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Trust me I agree now

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