I was just thinking about how an acquaintance of mine who also has sz has asked me nearly every time we’ve hung out the question “Do you think I’m normal?” and I’ve always told him “Yes, I think your normal” In fact I think he’s trying to be too normal. I would never assume he had a mental illness if I didn’t already know that about him. He dresses normal, looks normal, speaks normal, everything about him is normal except perhaps what goes on privately in his mind.
I’ve never told him that I think he’s too concerned with being normal. I’ve only told him that I would never have guessed that he had schizophrenia. In fact he’s so normal that I find him to be honestly a little boring. From what he’s told me I’ve gathered that his concept of normality is someone who is in his words a “straight laced, clean cut conservative”. If that’s who ya are than be that, but the guy I’m talking about is an abstract artist who hears voices. I’m not sure he should be trying to be what his concept of normality is…that is if it was his even his own concept to begin with. Not that I’m thinking of telling him this but I don’t know it just got me thinking.
Me? I as it may be apparent have never been overly concerned with being normal. I mean before my onset of serious mental illness I was a little different. My friends have always been a little different themselves. I admired those who were their own unique people. I just hate to see someone striving so hard and being so concerned with whether or not they fall within the confines of normality. It is possible to have a mental illness and be normal but it is also possible to differ in ways from what is normal and not have a mental illness or be some sort of deviant or anything like that.
Sometimes I imagine people reading my posts and thinking wow this guy is nuts when in reality this is the way I’ve always been. This is my normality.
What’s your normality like?