Psychoanalyst said

That I’m afraid of bonding, that’s why I see people as fake actors

She said that I was against the father/God in puberty cos I was against my real father. I have trauma and trauma causes psychosis

I didn’t get schizophrenia in one day, she said…
It’s accumulated for years

It’s easier to say that people are fake in a matrix than take responsibility and relate to them

I told her that I have no self, no control over my thoughts, actions, feelings.
She said that gradually we will discover my limits and self

I fear intimacy. Which is true.
Many things she said are true, I had never thought about them

Every time we meet, we go deeper in my self and subconscious

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Sounds insightful.

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I think that the matrix is my inability to feel included in the society which surrounds me.

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