Pregnant and feeling alone

I think that this pregnancy has caused a bit of a relapse in emotions. Or maybe it’s just life getting to me. A weird lightning bolt fried our modem and I’m using my phone to type this. I have a bunch of things to do online today including see my therapist which will have to be done over the phone instead. I hate not seeing the other person.

Yesterday at work I saw this women I met at church and she was super stand off and made me feel like a bad person. It’s hard pretending to be Mennonite so I can have a friend. That’s what church was about, yea I believe in God but I go to church looking for friends. There’s been no other churches open since we’ve been here last Feb. My husband’s having a mental health crisis as well. He needs a doctor which he refuses to go to because he’s paranoid about losing our two year old. I can understand that but he’s health should come first and we are good parents. I think of my son before anyone else.

I really just need a friend, I don’t have any. I can’t talk to my husband through his crisis. Even though I want to I feel a bit drained. I don’t have a family like he does either. His mom and dad are involved. That makes me jealous. I don’t feel like I can open up to anyone, anywhere. My feelings are a bit overwhelming.

That must be very lonely.

You can always talk to us, but I know sometimes talking to someone face to face gives more relief.

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