Sooooo. The last two times I have been on first shift, my wife has gone to dinner with her friends, and I stay home with the kids. She went last night, and we got into a little bit of an argument over it, mostly because I’m jealous of the fact that she has friends and can do things, and I’m always either at work or at home.
So today she messaged an old friend of mine and asked if he was busy tonight. He then texts me and asks if I want to hang out. I’m embarrassed because I feel like he only asked out of pity, but at the same time I feel like I would like to get out of the house.
He invited me over to his place to play poker, and now I feel like chickening out. I don’t know who’s going to be there, and I haven’t interacted with people other than family in probably 2 years. Ugh, it feels like a catch-22, cause I feel shitty about not having friends but I feel shitty and anxious thinking about being around other people.
Well here goes nothing. Family went shopping so now I’m home alone, so I guess I’m gonna go. Anxiety still on high alert. The other thing is I know there will be drinking, and I’ve been on the wagon for almost 3 years now, but still struggle with the urges, but I’m never around it so it’s not too hard to fight.
I have the same problem with socialising, I don’t mix with others very often at all. I enjoy playing poker online, maybe it won’t be so bad being there if that’s what you are doing, with any luck you’ll be too busy concentrating on the game than having to worry about making conversation. Hey, you might even come home with a few more £££ than you left with You could always have a ‘get out clause’ if it makes you feel better about going… Like what people do on blind dates, get your wife to text you at an arranged time, and if you’re ok, you can hang out and chill, and if it’s too much, at least you made the effort to go out for a bit. Chances are, you’ll probably relax and be ok once you get there. I hope you go, I know it’s a lonely life when you tend to isolate.
Well I’m here, it was ok at first but everyone else is smoking weed and drinking so I didn’t play well and lost all my money already. I feel like I should have stayed home.
Don’t know if it is too late to say this but I say you should go. I usually don’t want to do things. Then I force myself to do them and find that I enjoy them after I begin.
I’m sorry it didn’t go well, I was really hoping it would be an easy chilled night for you. It must have taken some courage for you to go, that’s a real shame it was so uncomfortable for you