Poetry and Art

Settling for Sanity

There is a seductive desperation–
It throws up its hands,
Beckons me to join its sad apathy in
Absence of hope.
To toss the towel into
The scrap heap of my life;
To refuse to walk the path of
To reject the offering
Of something much less
Than what seems Just and Possible.
I prefer Blackness to shades
Of muddy grey.
Is it Pride
That bids me reject a plea bargain?
Choosing rather to gamble on the hope
Of elemental, absolute freedom
Rather than accepting
Courtyard-contained breaths of air
And small glimpses of sunlight.
I hate sour grapes…
But I spurn Life’s doggie bag.
If it is God’s hand that proffers:
Dare I avert my face?
Better to swallow my scream
And accept with thanks?
(Submission or insincerity?
Humility or pretence?)
So much work and pain
Just for mere existence.
I’d dreamed of significance
And was granted subsistence.
It is soon to plunge once more
Off the cliffs of Despair,
Yet I cannot find the will
To cling longer to the unyielding
Face of this obdurate wall.
I’d sooner be hurled along the
Current of mad rapids below
Approaching the depths–
Instead of this pointless tenacity.

my poetry and artwork are on an internet site but I’m new here so am not allowed to post a link. You can look it up here ( www dot soulstrains dot weebly dot com.) Here is a poem from that site:
a Lot of my paintings are there too. You have to click on the topics (like “pain” or “madness”, and you will see that other tabs pop up and behind each of those tabs is a poem and a piece of artwork.


Just a reminder, not sure if you know this, but user submitted content here is under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported license. Personally, I dig it, Creative Commons is awesome. Some people may not like it so much.


Thanks for letting me know. Yeah…it has its ups and downs. I will keep it in mind.

Really appreciate your poem, Locamotion. It IS beautiful. I love poetry and painting. Take care.


Thank you , I am glad you like it. It was written after I had ECT which destroyed my short term memory completely. I was angry that I was forced to settle for a more “normal” life, yet without full use of my brain. The talents I had prior to illness have gone unused because I no longer am able to have full access to my mental faculties.

I am sorry to hear that your short term memory was destroyed by ECT (what was that? something like X-ray?). Anyway, keep thinking, writing and painting. I am doing writing, too. So I know how much joy the writing can bring to a person. (-: Best wishes.


here is a song i did back before I became schiz

It’s beautiful and thanks for sharing.