Please please help me

I’m falling apart. I have been on 100 mg of Clozaril (or various doses) for a year and it’s been really good but in the last few days I’ve noticed this butler who stands beside me (never sits always stands) and it’s a dog and it pushes these thoughts through my ears and into my brain. I’m worried that it will edge out the space in my brain.

Has anyone else dealt with this please help me I’m panicking I’m so anxious and I emailed my doctor but I’m too anxious to do anything right now and I don’t know if this is like seriously a butler dog or if I need to change my meds help

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It definitely sounds like you need a med adjustment. It’s good you contacted your doctor.

Is there an “as needed” (PRN) medication you can take, right now, to help calm you down?

Does your doctor have a crisis line for urgent issues?

I have an anxiety prn but I literally feel like I’m going to throw up. I emailed him and he read it (kaiser tells you) so I know he’ll get back to me but it’s almost the end of the workday and any person overnight won’t change my meds.

problem is he’s changing my anxiety/depression med too and this just cropped up right before I’m starting the new med.

am I going to be okay

It sounds like you’ve become psychotic. I’d get urgent medical attention.

If your doctor doesn’t respond to your email quickly, you should consider going to the hospital.

Otherwise you could become a danger to yourself or others.

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@bedubbs

I agree with everything that @everhopeful said. If your doctor doesn’t respond, today, you should definitely go to the hospital.

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But do you think… I don’t see the butler, I just know he’s there so that’s not a big deal right? he’s here but I can’t see him with me eyes so it’s okay right?

Hey, could a mod post the crisis info, just in case?

@ninjastar @Moonbeam @rogueone @ZombieMombie

Well, you’re really panicked, which isn’t good. Whether you see the butler or just sense him, it’s really freaking you out.

Maybe you should take your anxiety PRN?

I can take one. I have a mental health support group tonight but I’m not sure I can keep it together. Should I try to go?

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I am sorry that you are going through this. I hope you feel better.

I think that would be a good thing IF you think it would help you cope enough to make it safely until tomorrow. And then you could hopefully work with your doctor.

If you think it won’t help or if you go and it doesn’t help enough, you really should go to the hospital.

Honestly, I think you need to go to the hospital if your doctor doesn’t help you out, today.

(hug)

Do you have any thoughts of harming yourself. You sound very distressed right now but try to realize that this is all just stuff going on in you mind. I know it can seem very real when it is happening. It sounds like some kind of med change or dosage increase may be in order. It just might take some time. You’ve taken the first step and contacted your doctor, if things get unbearable there is always the hospital emergency room. Once you talk to your doctor and your meds get adjusted there is a good chance you will be okay.

If you are feeling suicidal or having a mental health crisis, please tell someone — a friend or family member, a teacher, a doctor or therapist or call 911 (if you’re in the U.S.) or the Emergency Medical Services phone number in your country.

You can also call a crisis intervention hotline—these are available in the U.S. and in many other countries. You do not need to be actively suicidal to benefit from a crisis hotline.

International crisis hotlines:

http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html

Crisis hotlines in the U.S.:

https://afsp.org/find-support/

More resources:

Not killing myself lately I mean I was thinking about it earlier this week but I’m doing better with that mostly I’ve been self harming because I’m stressed out and I don’t know what to do and I’m worried that my doctor is going to send me inpatient to get my meds adjusted because he’s adjusting two meds not just one and I HATE the ER I literally can’t stand it. I’ve been inpatient in bed restraints booty juiced all that ■■■■ and the ER is STILL the worst part.

100mg is a very low dose of Clozapine. Tell your symptoms to your Dr, he’ll probably increase the dose. Clozapine max dose is 900mg so you’re not even in the middle.

I never self harmed, but I understand where you are coming from. They once strapped me down to a gurney. They’ve locked me up in the psych ward for weeks. I hated it too. However, a few years ago they made a med adjustment and switched me to Lurasidone and my life improved dramatically, in a way I never thought possible.

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