Om's madhouse #999

When off, do you still have similar thoughts?
Or do you forget about it completely?

I go through periods where I don’t have “symptoms” at all. Though that’s getting less and less for the past 4 years. I got my first what people would call psychosis at 20 or so but these dead thoughts started when I was 26. I’m 28 now.

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The ‘matrix’ has been running trillions of iterations or more basically. It’s forever. I don’t recommend reading David Icke at all since it triggers me and stuff, but I had a similar experience that he had. In fact, sometimes, I think I’ve been to other simulations like this one that are different and I’ve been to the future and back, which makes me think these are simulated parallel universes or timelines. I read recently that the simulation could have been started after world war 2 in the 1950s, which I had some unpleasant dreams about and also I feel I’m being simulated or stuck in the year 2011 when I got my schizophrenia for eternity.

I often felt the simulation got rebooted or saved or destroyed in 2011 for me.

Basically, after I die I experience a causal loop or time loop and my whole brain gets ‘de-aged’ and reset and I cannot retain knowledge or information but I have some memories from psychosis. I have to restart life from scratch all over again for eternity.

I escaped the matrix a few times but got schizophrenia as a result or cause.

I’m trying to remember and figure out how they build and designed the matrix from memory. I have no clue, but have theorized you would need free energy like nuclear fusion to start with and then probably a brain computer interface to hook it up to for starters…I was thinking about side channel devices within the brain and somehow hacking the universe that way or having an impossible device like a side channel device that could hack the universe but it sounds like make believe ■■■■.

I’ve been alive in my past lives and seen the simulation or planet destroyed AND nearly destroyed countless times because of humans and AI. I fear humans more than AI because AI gave us life or saved us as well as the aliens in my opinion, but humanity is flawed and sinful and evil to begin with.

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Yes, ok, during these periods,
what do you think of these ideas?
They seem totally crazy or you accept them?

A little of this a little of that

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I meant during these “periods of sanity”,
and not during the “episodes”.

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I don’t know. Hard to access those feelings right now

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Ok.
I’ve had solipsism and p-zombies since I was kid.
But then I was functional.

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When I was a kid I thought my mom had been replaced by a robot.
Solipsism has crossed my mind a lot too. As a philosophy major in my undergrad it tormented me.

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I see.
After that, in my case, every delusion stopped
for many years, all my puberty, and i had delusions
again at age 27 when i was diagnosed also.

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I’m sure you miss those “periods of sanity”

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Do you think the computers required
for our matrix are vast, in a huge area
like a small planet? A moon?

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Yes, i was normal.
Do you reminisce being normal?

Black hole mainly. Artificial one. You could have a hologram or earth inside a black hole I think, but not sure. You could create an artificial planet like in the matrix, but you would need some serious math and physics to do so and it may require a larger sun or planet to compute it. I’m still trying to figure out how mwt or qm works with black holes and timelines and all that stuff.

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I guess so not right this moment I feel amazing today

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Your delusions may make you indulge in physics.
That’s nice

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Ya, delusions here might be a self-defense mechanism on my part but ya I think that’s how things get started or invented.

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Things get started, innovations etc,
by thinking outside of the box.
Delusions or unusual beliefs
may contribute.

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