Not sure how to feel

Last night my husband and I were hanging out with a couple friends at our friends place. For explaining we’ll just call them tim and fred. My husband had fallen asleep. (We were at tims place who lives in the apartment above us.) Tim seemed really tired but fred and I were both pretty awake not ready to go to sleep. I felt bad cause I felt I was bothering tim and I made the comment to fred that we could go down to my apartment. So we wouldnt bother my husband or Tim. I didnt even think at all how that could sound. I just didnt want to be bothering anybody.

So then today my husband is at work and says that fred told him that I suggested having him go to my place. He said that he trusts me but that he needs to hear me say that I didnt mean anything by it. Just to help that annoying little voice of doubt go away. I did and I told him that at the time I didnt even realize how that could come across the wrong way.

On one hand I kind of understand because that little voice can be very irrational but on the other hand I am hurt about it. I’m hurt that my husband needs me to reassure him that I won’t cheat. I meant it in my vows when I agreed to only him and every other promise after that. I dont know what to feel.

Regardless of anything, people need reassuring

Wouldn’t worry about it!

This Fred sounds like he read too much into an innocent situation


I did apologize to fred because I was worried I made him uncomfortable which certainly wasnt my intention. He said it was fine and didnt take it that way so I dunno.

Probably just an it is what it is and now I’m the one overcomplicating and I just gotta breathe and move on.

1 Like

Yea, wouldn’t worry.

I am sure your husband trusts you


ive done it. needing to be reassured of not cheating. BUT i was young. 18. she had gone to russia for a month. never i feel do that in a marraige.

1 Like

People aren’t perfect. I think it’s ok your husband felt vulnerable and needed reassurance.


I find it harder to always say appropriate stuff with sz. Since sz sometimes I say inappropriate stuff without thinking about how it sounds and about consequences. My parents have warned me several times to not share secrets of other people etc They say its inappropriate and disrespectful. I just can’t control what comes out of my mouth since having sz and I regret it later feeling guilt.

1 Like

Don’t make a huge deal about it, it’s just one of those awkward, innocent incidents that happen every now and then and could happen to anybody. Just be happy it ended as it did and your husband didn’t make a big deal over it. You explained it to Fred and your husband and everybody understands it was an innocent mistake. Don’t make a big deal about it.

1 Like

This topic was automatically closed 14 days after the last reply. New replies are no longer allowed.