Not going to freakout

But holy **** ive done nothing with myself the last 4 years. Beside getting off alot of weight. Which is good at my highest i was 250. Just weighed in at 183.5 my goal is 175 for starters. I can afford a gym membership and probably always will be able too. Im fasting until i hit a targrt of 180-175 steady. Hvae plenty of energy. Has anyone tried invega? It made me gain 15 lbs within a month. I know after i get bwck to the gym ill be feeling better. I used to be on this forum all tHe time. Ill log on on my computer. Been tired of using my phone. Might be helpful tO keep a window open on PC.

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I’ve just been sitting here in front of the computer trying to learn 3d modeling and animation or CGI in general… For somewhere around 10 years. Made some progress but not enough. Struggling with weight too.

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That’s pretty nice. Cool about the modeling. I don’t have many times where I’m feeling like this (useless). I used to play a lot of video games but recently I’ve found they don’t bring me anything but grief (beside some single player games). I’m 31 now I just hope i find myself happy before i get too older. I’ve thought about going back to school but i really can’t see anything like that now. I’m on SS and can’t imagine working in these days and times, I can’t stand anything political and school seems like it’d be a real bad time, plus not going to take on any debt.

That’s pretty cool about the modeling. sounds fun, something to work on. I have been known to paint using oils and water colors & some inks. just a real low time for me it seems. not doing anything.

I had a sucide attempt around 10 years ago and i got electro compulsive therapy (ECT)in that time. I haven’t done anything either since than. I got books, a gymmat, wordpuzzles, etc… Recently i got support workers helping me getting a life. It seems to work, i shave regulary lately and we talk a lot. Going to the beach, pool and shopping centre. I cut some unhealthy friends out of my life as well. I wasn’t connected to our mental health system since the ECTs and i was angry with them that long.

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It took me a while to realize that it helps to be inspired to create, and its hard to find things that are inspirational. Maybe if you find some inspiration you can do some painting… or drawing. I am thinking about going back to school too but I have been isolated for so long I think it would be hard.

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Thats actually really inspirational. I know about cutting people out. I have a much more stable mind since then. Quit drinking as well. What kind of word puzzles?

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It got crosswords, wordgames, logic puzzles and the solutions are in the back of the book. Its only $10 at the newsagency. I wait to get the right mindset to get started. I am not sure at the present time about my goals and what i want to achieve. I can’t imagine it. I am 53 years old and i am not getting younger.

Yes I’m on invega, I also haven’t done anything for a few years

What do you mean you’ve done nothing? You dropped your weight and quit drinking. Those are both huge accomplishments. Kudos.

I did nothing for ten years but a few things. I know what you mean, there’s a lot of hours in the day. I gave up feeling bad about not working. I felt bad about it for 25 years. I’m retired.

True. Sometimes i forget about that. Quitting drinking probably saved my life.

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