Hi! I come by every now and then, I can’t remember the last time I was here.
I’ve started seeing a psychiatrist and since then have been placed on haldol for my hallucinations and buspirone for anxiety. So far the haldol works wonders, and sometimes knocks out my hallucinations for a whole day. The buspirone helps a bit too, but makes me crazy nauseas which isn’t good with my other condition. All in all, I was nervous about seeing a doctor after so many years but I’ve had nothing but good experiences so far, with 3 visits.
Still I feel like my anxiety gets out of control too often. I feel like my coping techniques are good enough, but I guess that’s the point of medicine. To get the results you can’t get on your own.
All in all, mental health has been decent. A few months ago I did have an inside voice tell me some good advice, which was bad because I hadn’t heard inside voices in many years. That was definitely brought on by stress.
I guess at the end of the day I am thankful that I am lucid enough to be able to analyze my own behavior. There were times where I was not. As my history here probably could show
I rememberd what the voice said! “Don’t talk about your signifiers.” It was a man’s voice too, which has never happened with an inside voice for me. Weird, but it was good advice regarding my predicament at the time. I overshare.
I am glad the Haldol works for you. It’s a very effective drug. Being able to have insight is a good thing. I find it helps stop delusions and things like that in their tracks.
Hope things continue and your anxiety gets better.
It’s so weird how medicine can affect people that differently.
I don’t necessarily hate my inside voices, they are just pests mostly. They don’t usually say nice things. Outside voices aren’t really directed at me, so I don’t have any qualms with them. Just some screaming in the back. lol
My grandmother died when i was around 15ish and i once looking up at a beautiful blue sky, thought about my lost grandmother. She was very kind, nice, super friendly, caring, and full of sunbeams. I looked up during that summer day and saw a large gently soaring bird in the air. Way, way, way up. Smoothly sailing.
My mom always said she wanted to be reborn as a bird if reincarnation was the truth. When she was born she was given the name “The Little Birdie That Lived”
I’ve mentioned a moment on here before many times, my favorite encounter with birds. I was at a show at a bar, and wandered off after some time. I found a massive tree filled with hundreds of birds all singing. I thought they were talking to me, asking me to play with them, so I danced around under the tree until eventually friends found me and brought me back.
Last week at my clinic, i was sitting outside singing along to HOTEL CALIFORNIA and as it got towards the end where he’s singing “YOU CAN NEVER LEAVE”…,
I think it goes like that,
But out in the trees like 150 medium birds flew out of the yard, as i was singing, and i was looking around waiting for a crowd of witnesses clapping, for a nature encore.
It’s good to hear from y’all! Thanks, I am doing fairly well! The same old obstacles of course.
Seems not much changes with time but hell, I’m happier.
Still got the stomach problems lol