Never fit in

Lounge
21

I’m sorry you feel unfit.

If sounds like you might need an attitude change.
If you feel smalltalk is beneath you and a waste of time, consider this:
Smalltalk is a stepping stone to bonding and trust.
If you can’t build enough of a bond or sense of trust with someone over small things, there’s a good chance you won’t reach that part of a friendship with them where deep or intellectual conversations happen.

Smalltalk is also a door opener. A conversation might start with “so, walking the dog, eh?” But it’s only a way to get a foot in the door. Chitchat often leads to deeper conversations if you participate without prejudice.

But it won’t, if you instantly write it off as annoying and useless.

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22

Yes, small talk is kind of like conversational foreplay. A way for people to test each other out to see if there is potential for something more. When you get to know people well you can talk more intimately with them.

There are books on the subject of conversation. I actually bought one. “The art of conversation”. Just need to read it :smiling_face: Have to meet people in the middle, can’t expect everything to fall in place without giving a effort.

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23

Can’t expect everything to fall in place without giving a effort

Bruh that’s kind of my religion lol

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24

I think most people on here either don’t fit in or think they don’t fit in. It’s very common.

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25

Agree. It’s the disease or the drugs or both. It just makes everything very difficult.

26

@crazydiamond444

Do you avoid everything or most things?

I avoid people irl avoid tv avoid things
Because i can only think better in quiet and cant deal with people or noise
I go for a coffee or food shop but only at quiet times occasionally

Theres good advice from people here
Btw

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27

I fit in only with some ppl.

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28

I don’t avoid anything even though I should. I do things that I know will trigger me so I can build up resistance to those triggers

29

Oh that has never worked for me ive tried doing that for years but mh just deteriorated to the point where i don’t handle anything stressful

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30

Sorry it might work for you though
I think positivity can get you so far

31

If you met me you wouldn’t think of me as a positive person. I’m more of a realist. But positivity does help. Gotta keep a smile while you’re fighting these battles, you know?

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32

Sorry im not good company
I feel like absolute trainwreck
I feel i never want to go out ever again
I feel desperate and hopeless

So im going to not comment too much
As im feeling way

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33

You’re with good company here. @spaceoptic

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34

No keep commenting it’s fine. You’re no more of a mess than I am

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35

I kid myself all the time
I tell myself i look acceptable
Im ok
But im not

I am a mess

Im mentally ill, fat and stuck
I keep fighting but the scope gets narrower and narrower to move
I cant
I feel like theres nothing i can do anymore

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36

Until you stop living from a place of fear you will feel stuck. When I was afraid to leave the house it was because I was projecting all sorts of awful things onto people and the outside world. Meanwhile the outside world didn’t care what i thought. It just kept going on anyway. We’re connected to reality but we aren’t the center of the universe. Most people are too busy doing their own thing to care about us. And because nobody cares, we’re free.

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37

I used to (when i made friends) only fit in with other misfits, until I would drift away from that too.

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38

I don’t fit in anywhere either.

I’m just a ball of anxiety that is why

I need to have therapy to work on that. I can’t rely on looks and health to be confident only.

It’s like I’m waiting for the 51kg day to arrive and hair treatment to finish then everything is better but that’s in like one year.

At least.

So I need to see if I can feel confident via other ways too.

I am sorry you feel you don’t fit in.

Tbh I think a lot of us feel like that here.

I do like the themes you post just currently have no concentration to watch them usually cos of their time length.

I wish you well Crazydiamond

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39

I relate to that.

I never fit in either.

I don’t fit in on this forum either.

I don’t want to fit in to society anyway if that means going against my morals as I have different beliefs than society with their hierarchy i don’t want part of.
I could be a little bit of a anarchist.

Best wishes for us to find our people.
We are just right for our people just as we are.

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40

Have you read the secret and the studies of Abraham hicks?

Just thought since you say manifest…