I’ve absolutely torn through my nails at this point. Always have been a nail biter.
I’m just wondering where the line should be drawn. So I’m looking for input. I’ve a case for all three.
Habit: I’ve chown😜 my nails since I was a kid. It’s been ingrained for many years. But admittedly I’m more self aware of stopping myself when I notice it, when I care.
Compulsion: when anxiety hits I I feel compelled to do it. Same feeling I get when I’m compelled to use. Same feeling I get when I pick at my skin.
Trigger warning
Self harm: I hate to admit it to myself, But I’ll do it it until they bleed, raw and sore. Stinging to the open air, stabbing when touched. When the anxiety is bad, when the voices are getting to me; I focus on it? Another distraction tool maybe. If the physical pain cuts the mental pain. That’s self harm…? That I don’t want to admit to myself.
Trigger off
What’s your experience? Where do you draw your line? Any tips or insights?
I know what you mean, I do the same thing with picking sometimes, I’ll be going along fine and I’ll be just about healed and then something will be bothering me and the compulsion to pick will be so great and then I’m all of a sudden digging at it until it’s bleeding and it gets so tender even to touch let alone pick and I don’t understand why I can’t just stop. I don’t know why I feel the need to torture myself. Why I get this satisfaction from it. It’s hard to know where to draw the line if it’s a habit, compulsion or self-harm. I think because it’s all 3 at different times maybe depending on how we’re doing mentally. So they are multi-purpose habits I think maybe. Idk I’ve never been able to crack the code or break the habit personally. I just came off a particularly bad round and I’m all chewed up right now and sore. Wish I could stop.
Yeah I’m on 200mg of Zoloft. I’ve noticed that’s helped me take notice of when I’m doing it, and I can better fight the compulsion too, can with a lot of compulsions.
Hrm, perhaps a ritual then?
Thanks Jim Bob. That helps, if I think about it like a ritual triggered by stress. The pet bird metaphor, the PETaphor, could have some weight.