My past makes me paranoid

Drugs, mafia members, prostitutes, being threatened by criminals from private numbers who knew where I live. I have addiction issues so its better for me to not live life. Its better for me to stay in bed all day everyday like I have been doing since joining this forum and posting since end of March 2020. I was worse when I was working as I was more broke than not working and had much more debts when I was working.

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He bought coke from them. I was strong enough to refuse my friend’s coke, he kept telling me to try it. I would go into instant psychosis if I did.

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How do I forget all these?

When I receive private calls I still think its them and I become fearful. Though they havent called since I stopped dealing with them. I blocked all private/unknown numbers in my phone’s settings. I still listen to voicemails, its always scam calls now.

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