She said they were all waiting for me to wake up. I woke up at 5 am and along with it came my awakening. I know for sure that two people I thought were friends don’t exist. And I realized my neighbours arent talking ■■■■ about me or screaming cruel things through the walls at me.
I walked around with my pants sagging, shoulders in a shrug, that went away too (yes I’m a big boy now, pants and all).
Saw my pdoc today and he said I could go to the hospital tomorrow morning, via direct admission to sort out my meds to help me more with being able to detect what’s real and what’s not. He says that since I’m quite calm and my behaviour does not resemble someone in a full on crisis, I’ll possibly be able to make good, meaningful progress this time.
I feel hope for the first time since my diagnosis.