My new boyfriend is coming over to my apartment tomorrow

For the first time if my Covid test is negative. I think I am driving him nuts with what does he like to drink and eat ect. I need to relax…

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Sounds good. Try and relax as beginnings are delicate times so they say but oh such more fun! Hope it goes well for you.

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Thanks @rogueone. I got busy cleaning up my apartment and then got some sleep. Now I’m just waiting for my Covid test results. I was exposed last week, but haven’t been sick. I’m fully vaccinated though.

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I’m happy for you. I’m in desperate need of some give and take. My fault for pushing everyone away. What’s wrong with me?!

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Thanks. I don’t know if there is anything wrong with you. I don’t know you very well.

I mean I won’t let anybody get close to me and I don’t know why.

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It’s probably the SzA. Are you afraid of rejection or maybe getting hurt?

I was. But I realized it’s better to be hurt than suffer loneliness. Everyone needs give and take, in friendship and romance too.

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I can’t reason thoughts well, my mind is dark.

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Being hurt all the time and remaining in a relationship rather than suffer loneliness? Interesting decision. Not sure if I will ever get to that point.

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You sound like you pretty much have it together on what you want. Not everyone is out to hurt you. I haven’t told my new boyfriend about the Sz yet, so I don’t know how he’s going to take it.

Whoa, tread with caution as this revelation might sink the relationship.

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To put it simply I realized it’s better to have a relationship and be hurt than always be alone. I didn’t mean stay in the relationship. I realized this but can’t make myself change, my mind is broke.

Thanks @yinyang. We just met a week ago and are just getting to know each other. I’m going to fix him lunch as he gets off work at noon.

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It’s predawn here. I went to sleep at seven p.m.

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I went to bed at 8pm and woke up at 2am.

I told my case manager, therapists, and friends he is coming over, what his name is, and where he works. I don’t think he’s any trouble though.

It’s exciting starting a new relationship and getting to know someone. Any guy would be impressed to see a clean/tidy living space. If you feel nervous or anxious, ask him questions about his life.

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