It would thrill her like the best of spook movies to invent a situation that scared her. As a child. I could not know what was real and what was her self-scaring invention. It was extremely destructive and I had to put physical distance between us in order to think. For a while I was caught up in her thrill seeking - hell raising ways only because when I asked for help, I was turned down.
take care 
I am taking care wherever I can find it. It takes 2 to tango and I now realize that part of her problem was a very controlling husband. She was not allowed any creative behavior. No wonder I’m so down on marriage.
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that is insightful…good on you for working it out
take care
Sounds similar to my parents situation. But I never thought about the controlling husband bit.