I don’t think I understood that for years. But if there is unconditional love, it is in a mother’s love for her children. When mother criticized me, I thought it meant she didn’t love me. But that was just me misunderstanding her. She did love me.
My mum has a habit of criticism. Like you I thought she didn’t like me cos I was just a burden. I now think she says these things cos she cares for me.
My mom always seemed so frustrated and annoyed by me. I believed I was only a burden to her.
I remember her having to go into the school because I wanted to take one class and a teacher wanted me to take another, and she defended me so passionately that I was stunned. The same when my medications were hurting me and my psychiatrist felt I was exaggerating and needed to power through it - my mom protected me like a lioness. I was so surprised that she would take my side over anyone else’s in the world.
She was busy and overstressed, and that made.it hard for her to give us the attention and love we wanted. When she retired, she made it her priority to make up for that. It took a while for me to believe her, but time has shown that she meant it.
This is such a lovely topic. My mom had a hard childhood and first marriage. I was her 7th child, born under emergency circumstances when she was 37. She tried so hard, but she didn’t have the energy to give me all the attention I needed. My mental illness was too much for her. But she loved me with all her heart, and this I know for sure. I in turn love my son with all my heart. I have clear limitations as well, but the love part is 100% ️
i am happy for you chordy
My mom is such a perfect product of common culture: she has lost herself in every man she’s been with and completely lacked any sense of objectivity with that person…not very different from her religiousness though.
I have no support in her by any means.
I know what it’s like to feel your mother is lost from you due to men.