I have a mentality that “everything happens for a reason” and “struggling can make you a better person” and “God wants me to succeed”…These three things have given me great benefit. I have recovered a great amount becomes of my beliefs, whether they are “unusual beliefs” or just beliefs… But regardless, I think a lot of people get jealous when you kick ass and they try to bring you down. They’d rather wallow in their own pain than think there’s a possible way out and you become a target if you are doing too well or too happy. And it confuses them. “Why is this kid happy and I’m not?” Instead of saying “I should be more like him” they get bitter, envious, jealous and wallow in their own grief. And then they do their best to bring me down.
Well I had my therapy session today, and she said that if I didn’t have PTSD, then being verbally abused would have bothered me in a completely different way. We do EDMR and tapping, and I gotta say, the tapping really freaking helps with overcoming traumas. she says if we get underneath all my traumas I can face the world and not be bothered by things that would normally trigger off my past traumas. She says the trauma of being bullied at work yesterday brought back memories to childhood bullying and triggered off a part of my brain that reminded me of the past. We had a good session I felt much better afterwards. She always says “everyone has issues”…I asked “If everyone has issues, then why do some people take their anger out on other people while other people like my boss, then me, I just have issues but could never harm a fly in practically my entire life”. She said something that made me believe, even though nurture is huge in development, nature is equally important. I may have just friendlier nature. Because I’ve had all the traumas that should make a man angry at fellow man. But my nature is different.