Because I have psychosis.
I’ve been praised and lauded for my personality, kindness, etc…but I’ve done horrible things during my psychotic episodes. I don’t even know what I did and I keep thinking of possible senarios of crimes I committed.
Even if I am innocent, I know that the fact I have psychosis will make me the most inept person, and I will not be lauded for my achievements because of my psychosis.
Once everyone finds out that I am mentally ill, I will be abandoned.
I believe I will die inept and worthless. I will be the least to be remembered.
I hate myself for being so inept and useless.