My heart aches for my boy

He’s 21 years old. He has tourettes, adhd and autism. He is doing so good. He has a great paying job and he’s a really great guy.

There’s only two things I wish I could help him with.
He has a giant heart for people and some people take advantage of him. Recently he loaned $750 to a guy that I will be shocked if he ever repays my son.
The other thing is he’d be the best most loving boyfriend. I just want him to find a nice young woman who will love him and treat him well. He gets so discouraged and sometimes comes across as needy.
I love him so much!

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I hope he finds love too. People with big hearts do get taken advantage of and it’s so hard on them. It’d be nice if he could share his big heart with someone who reciprocates that love and care. Does he ever get opportunities to be social with others? Is he involved in any groups or anything?

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He’s involved in some church groups for young adults. He has other friends as well. He is a really social guy.

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Llama support for your boy

Just help keep that spark alive. Help him realize he was taken advantage of and to be more careful. He probably feels awful. I would.

He works, so he’s got some social, I hope he has friends. That would help.

With those things, and his spark intact, he’ll find an amazing woman, if he wants.

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@FatMama I’m needy too… He sounds like a very nice young man

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His dad has a hard time phrasing things trying to help him understand why he shouldn’t have loaned that money. And my son gets so upset. I try to mostly listen and come up with solutions for future times it could happen. Maybe I’m too easy on my kids but I’m a nurturer. And I’m a listener. And my heart breaks when they are hurting.

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Hopefully he can find someone through his social activities. That’s usually the best way.

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I agree that you don’t want to be hard on him and use the “loan” as a teaching and learning experience for the future

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Such is a mother’s woe, understandable.

If that’s what he needs from you, and he comes to you. Keep that going.

Does he have trouble with the concept of deception? My ex roommate did, he’s always loan stuff out to the most obvious scammers. He was autistic. Was hard for him to realize people wanted to take advantage of him because he couldn’t imagine doing it to others.

He exercised that by telling two truths and a lie, just to understand what it was like to deceive. He hated it. Made him angry.
But he slowly started to process it. Started to pick up more blatant clues that others were doing it to him.

Maybe that could help your son.

But I’m no expert. You know him best

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He definitely has trouble reading people. When he was younger we worked on that quite a bit. He asks me occasionally what someone may have meant when they said something to him. He reads me his wonderful and heart breaking poetry. I’m truly blessed to be able to continue to be a support for him. I just can’t even express how proud I am of him.

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It’s mostly because you were supporting him all these years, you gave him a chance in this world. Your love, your support. You’ve helped shape him into the amazing person he is.

In my eyes that makes you amazing too.

I would believe he shares his writings with you for a special purpose. You have a lot of love in your life. Congratulations.

He will find love too. He can’t not with you watching his back

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This is also an experience that will serve your boy. Your son has now realized that money should never be lent. So he gets angry with his father who tries to make him understand. This is a phase in which your child is disappointed by the friend he trusted and angry with himself first of all for having trusted too much and this anger takes her “out”. I too happened to lend money and not get it back.

There are many girls out there who love sweetness. The social qualities in this case help.
I wish you all the best

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What about church girls? Does he want a gf? Sometimes it’s better to be alone than to be with the wrong person.

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@FatMama. My daughter’s single. She’s 22. I’ll pay her way if she wants to go to Canada!!!

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He so badly wants a girlfriend.

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Poor guy!!!
Hey you know what? I think my daughter has Aspergers and ADHD.

Lake Erie is a 5 hour drive and she has a passport

I’ll stop. I’m just joking

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Lol I just looked up how far that is to Manitoba. It’s a 19 hour drive!

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