Moved out into my trailer

I am happy, i am alone. It is confusing. My boyfriends and I are having a different relationship. Talking more online than before, i am not use to that. I am not pregnant. I took a test today, it is just my health is suffering. I am recovery by non physical sexual abuse because of my moms husband. He is still mad at me, my ex is mad at me and i am choosing to not see my son on purpose because of his abusive nature and one of my new bf exes made my friends and family stop talking or associating with me. I feel like ny bf and i are getting closer. It feels good to me, i am telling opening up to them about myself and more brave, recovering from abuse is hard. I have been having suicidal thoughts and stop them. I have also thought about abusing drugs too. Its Valentines day and I am grateful. New part of town new territory, new lies, new life.

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My parents did not know i was sneaking my boyfriends into the attic, it was so funny to me. We were keeping it secret.

Iā€™m happy for you that you feel better about your living situation now. I hope this helps a lot in your recovery.

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Yeah me too. I am trying to get my boyfriends to move in with me. I do not know how to do it. Any tips?

I went to the store this morning, started a diet. Need to take meds ugh.

I sneaked out i was afraid of the exes. See my moms sister and husband watch over the computers u know and i had to buy a pregnancy test. I was embarrassed i did not tell my bfs i hope they do.not think i cheated this is cuz of my sexual abuse. Is it ok to watch porno? I have a hard time getting there.

I feel like if i share it with my bfs its ok. I feel guilty tho but i have actually been feeling more sexual. Less weird.

Its a chemist diet called the egg fast.

I notice I get really big to scare people. I have been 114lbs while happy if i want to fight someone i up my weight class until i know i have the advantages kinda like a wrestler?

I do not feel any less beautiful at my weight and my boyfriends i can tell actually love me at any weight. I have not ever felt this way before. Took meds.

Look like odom omg!

I had two doctors app for tomorrow but i cancelled due to stress. Reschedule yeah. Sometimes i feel like people try to get me to leave my house so they can follow me. I am gonna chill on that with my three enemies trying to get me to blow money. I like it when my bf corrects me without saying anything.

I found it searching google images for 190lb women muscular build.

When you put on weight to intimidate someone they are going to call you fat because they want you to get small so they can intimidate you. I love yelling at people while being large and in charge.

The pregnant thing well my sister is pregnant so anytime i was being abused i could play the pregnancy card and then use my sister as defense, if you do not like me i guess you do not like my sister and thing you say to me, you are saying about my sister. I will tell her what you said.

I see why my sister does not go over there moms husband uses crank bathtub crank so does Samantha its a cheaper form of Crystal meth made with inferior chemicals and i am so glad to be away from that contaminated house. Its been a rough week coming off that especially when i was not willing this man was touching my ā– ā– ā– ā–  going into my room.