Maybe theres always a brainsoup in the start of the aps?


Maybe I should remain patient? I don’t switch meds since a year. Since 5 months I am on a bigger dose of Zyprexa. But maybe I was really numbed by the meds, cause testing everything around, isn’t it? One doc thought it in fact…
Plus, I am still quite paranoid and very anxious and worried. Maybe this is the hardest to recover on meds, what do you think? So I should continue waiting?
I try to be more active now, but I wont lie to you - its very, very few still.
Whats happening with me? well, sometimes my brainsoup is very painful so I lose hope. sometimes, its just bearable but nothing more still. I make 5 minutes walks around my building. Before, I couldn’t do even this… Its been too long that I was ill, I am afraid about my recovery. I wish it would be faster.
and you, whats up with you? Did you forget me? I read you every day :wink:


Oh please hang in there @Anna1.
Taking a short walk around the house is progress.
Don’t give up.


With my irritability wave I don’t feel as a good person. I am even suicidal sometimes, cause I live myself as a psychopath…
Thanks for supporting, dear :slight_smile:
But did the isolation made the things so bad in your opinion? maybe I am treated really late now, which why I feel my meds as candies even :cry: .all that they do for the moment is to smash my brain…


Brainsoup… have eaten lamb brain soup in Germany in a restaurant…my mouth gets watery. Haha…not really.


Take things one step at a time.


ok, but I take them like this since 20 years, wave… I let myself down, that’s all. and its even worse that I turned as a mean person sometimes :frowning: .


It’s ok, don’t beat yourself up about it.
Living with this disorder is not easy.
We cannot expect perfection.


Ok, yes, you are right. Its a hard disease. I am in bad state so I don’t realize the reality still. But I just wonder if ill continue improving despite my years of isolation. I am stuck with the meds also, they had their limits for the recovery on me…


I am sure that you can improve @Anna1.


medication is supposed to be making you better


but you must make the effort

can’t you exercise or feel good about some hobby?


But don’t we have a supposed shock from the aps in their start? Those are heavy meds, daze… They can knock out an elephant. Even one of my pdocs said that I am numb cause I took too many… who else felt bad in the start of his/her meds? But it was the necessary evil… I struggle to regain thinking on those meds in combo with the illness…


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