I believed I was allowed to say whatever I could say and think whatever I could think. I concluded things that as notions were shallow and erroneous. I declared it was me against the world, or it was like a showdown or face off over god. I ennerved myself that some sort of suffering in the world was like a chain effect that persons were uncomfortable with, like at religious ceremonies, on the grounds of challenging belief, at the level of mythology. They blamed this for war, and illnesses, instead of accepting medicine or sciences, as some sort of mythology. As an unusual belief I developed a penchant for abusing skepticism, like I create absurdist arguments or doubt things only absurdly, letting something else before me get past. I believed in absurd arguments or thinking that was hateful or angry instead of being skeptical in a more sane approach.
SZ makes you pessimistic and gullible, so you start humoring really ridiculous lines of thought, like being a biblical badguy or something.
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