It’s so hard to describe myself. Sometimes, especially late at night, something happens to my brain and I feel free of stress, my temperature gets cooler and my thoughts lighter, and I can think faster and I feel a little more like me… But as soon as I open my mouth my voice decides to clam up and I can barely speak, much less speak what’s on my mind… My mind and mouth are disconnected and I barely have the energy to let loose my vocal chords… I always feel like something else is guiding me or rather, misguiding me. Like every word I say or every letter I type has to be rehearsed at a moments notice in order for me to reflect on whether or not whatever I am about to communicate would have the approval of whatever outside force is watching and judging my every move. I’m so insecure and I haven’t felt like me in years.
sorry…you are feeling like this. 
take care 
My son watches static on computer or on tv. He was recently diagnosed with schizophrenia. I can only imagine the insecure feelings. Thanks for sharing. So hard to understand all this.
CBT. CBT. CBT. (Works on this stuff.)
REBT – Rational emotive behavior therapy - Wikipedia
Schematherapy – Schema therapy - Wikipedia
Learned Optimism – Learned optimism - Wikipedia
Standard CBT – http://www.beckinstitute.org/what-is-cognitive-behavioral-therapy/About-CBT/252/
DBT – http://behavioraltech.org/resources/whatisdbt.cfm
MBSR – Welcome to the Mindful Living Blog
ACT – ACT | Association for Contextual Behavioral Science
10 StEP – Pair A Docks: The 10 StEPs of Emotion Processing
Thank you! Thank you
I’m sorry for you and your son… Thank you for support
Thank you, very much
I don’t know if it was static for me.
I know the racing thoughts would keep my voice locked…
What I wanted to say seemed to spin by faster then I could say it and it took a lot of work to slow the brain down enough to say simply things.
It would be too hard to get a thought together… much less talk about it.
Hope things get better for you soon… 