"Living in the attic"

I am “hidden” in my attic for months, there I have a bed I have have a table to put the the computer without much light (prefer not much light), I go downstairs to eat, I take bath and do hygiene, but I rarely leave the bed, the computer or the attic. I want silence or music not too loud. Before I had some activities: to play music, to read (not very often), to run, I used to ride a bike, there were times I enjoyed public space (like going to library and walking on the street), I had some interest in going out with friends not by super imposition like now, I was involved in studies and the success was none almost, but I was connected and studying. I totally forgot why I used to do this things, the reason and the purpose, I do not experience sensations of pleasure I can recall easily to try to repeat them. But I do miss people I haven`t found yet, I just like they were here with me. No one who hardly leaves his bed thinks about to get a job. it is not very realistic, I think.
What should I do? Any ideas to start once again the process of recovery?

what medications are you on right now?

I am on Invega Sustena 100mg (Xeplion injectable) and Triticum. This drug does not favour me much but it control the positive symptoms, Risperdal was worse! Abilify allowed me to have activities but side effects were too severe.

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maybe its the invega that is having these cognitive effects on you , lack of interest/feeling did it begin with this medication that can be a side effect of some psych meds

The available options I know, are not very good too, for example Seroquel puts my stomach upset and do not have any advantage more, Risperdal was a nightmare in every way, Abilify was great for activity initially but then only “cosmetic” only, I was so uncomfortable with akathisia, gut was not regulated too (a distressful situation) and induced some side effects very dangerous which I do not even want to talk about. I hope the is a phase, I am experiencing negative symptoms again, I think.

There’s always a way to get active again and get your mind on (practical things) that occupy you to drown out that (shithole noise). I’ve been doing alot of gardening, we’ve planted probably ten tomatoe plants, beans, lettuce, herbs, parsnips, all sorts of cool vegtables.

I think if you just got outside and saw how your surroundings could use the improvement, maybe you’d get away from being sedentary. I also, am on invega-it’s helped me so much and I miss doses of daily meds all the time but invega is my backup.

But to let you know more:


I take alot of medicine, and lately I’ve promised myself to not drink for thirty days…maybe I’ll gain some more cognitive ability from being sober that long…do you drink?

yes hopefully its just a phase having no feelings and no interests definately is not something that improves your quality of life which is the entire point of taking meds to have a better life and it isnt a side effect that you should feel you have to accept if it makes your life worse and not better .

There three things that look similar but have different avenues for change. Specifically, depression, over medication on antipsychotics, and negative symptoms of schizophrenia all look similar.

Wish I knew what to do for myself . . .


@neveragain No, I do not drink never… but I take tons of coffee, I try to overcome tiredness this way, which is not positive if there is no balance. Gardening is good. I do not got out much because I am a little bit sensitive to noise and too much light - lately - but, specially, I feel like to be alone this way or with someone very special to me. I tend to do wake up paranoia so I do the most basic think, to cut off social exposure, specially when physical expression is also evolved, gestures, the way people look and say things, I avoid double meanings and false perceptions and suspicions. Paranoia seems less treatable than sensory hallucinations. Many medications you listed there!.. I have heard that alcohol acts as a depressor when mixed with psychotropics. You would certainly benefit to stop to drink.
Another reason why I am like this is very physical, I do not know where all my energies go but I am so tired… Basically I know what I have to do but I have not yet the will to take some efforts, I am not much responsive to this adversity right now. I hope it is temporary. It has been a while since I feel this way, I tried to investigate if a clinical depression existed or not but this is not very clear for now. Thanks for your reply, and good luck to stop drinking and even more improvements.

@Jayster @lovemysisterkelly Thank you for the replies. I have interests but at this time not the forces to accomplish them. Caffeinism. I identified it as a cause of tiredness too that leads to poor sleep quality sometimes. I also studied that like tobacco, the caffeine intake may vary in schizophrenic patients. About the sleep, I think it a big key to start, sleep seems to regenerate, the part of the day I have a little of spontaneous motivation and planning to do tasks is the time after to sleep and it depends on the quality. When sleep is not good for bad and poor decisions occur and I have more questioning why do I exist and what is worth is life. Little important details. I am working on the causes to try to solve them and to improve life skills, I was much more functional even after schizophrenia. Lack of motivation is very difficult sometimes, and I agree with Jayster, there is not a clear line to distinguish the three things.

I complained to my doctors about heart burn, and they told me to stop smoking tobacco and stop drinking caffeine, Now, I stopped smoking and quit caffeine. I still have heart burn. Doctors lie.



I wish I knew how to help. But if you were better that way on abilify, then maybe abilify was helping negative symptoms. Or maybe your current med isn’t helping. Or maybe your current med is making things worse. Just the negative symptoms I mean.

Maybe iti-007 will help when it comes out.

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i think the problem is self delusion more than lying doctors believe the self delusion that they know whats wrong when they should admit that they really dont know because they dont each individual person is different and what might work great for one person might be a huge fail for the next so guesswork and experimentation is the only thing that can be done what works for one person might or might not work for the next any doctor who asserts that this will work and deals in absolutes and close minded thinking should be a red flag .

@lovemysisterkelly For example, I had problems with doses before, now I am possibly over medicated, not sure. I know that finding the lowest effective dose is not like a dead certain perhaps, takes experimentation. I had the inverse phenomenon also which lead to an hospitalization.

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yes being over medicated can be just as disabling as psychosis and when your on more than one medication that confusion is multiplied thats why the lowest effective dose should be sought for each medication that should be the doctors goal ive come across people who say that their doctors medication plan for them is to increase their dose to a certain level that means the doctor has some preconcieved idea about a certain dosage and drug and its universal effectiveness and he is not treating them as an individual you are your only patient and you know when something isnt working for you if the doctor ignores you or seems close minded about a med regime you should get a second opinion.

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