Schizophrenia.com

Live or echo voice

I hate going out to stores but you have to get groceries sometimes.
All the workers give me a hard time I hear them
say things
lately its been racial slurs
but they slur me with their own race slur
I mean they are of the race they are sluring me about
I am multiple ethnicities and people don’t know what to call me.
but I do not approve of slurs of any group

Ditto on the hating going shopping thing. I feel so vulnerable, so nervous, so exposed.

For me it’s the other way around though, it’s as if something inside me is hurling racial slurs at others. It apparently only accepts people who are either white or hispanic. It also asks certain people, are you Jewish? and are you a Muslim?

It…sucks. The most racist/intolerant thing I’ve done in my life that I can think of is draw a swastika in the sand on the playground in 3rd grade.

It also says disgusting sexual stuff, I don’t know what’s worse. I basically feel possessed by a perverted Nazi.

I sometimes wonder if I am being haunted by some nasty racist person.

I guess some of my jokes as a child would now be considered racist, i was thinking I would be a comedian and I copied a lot of the ethic jokes that i saw on tv but by 5th grade i outgrew that.
I am always super conscious of trying not to offend anyone and maybe worry almost to the extreme about that.

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Well if that’s true, what would you rather do?

id rather have social interactions

I think because right before that happened I got strong you don’t belong here type vibes and this is a store i rarely go to its in a very upscale neighborhood and I go there because they have some speciality items I like but usually I am not bothered there its the other store near me that I get trouble with.
I am of partial arab heritage and that is my fear that that is why I am singled out. But I grew up as an adoptee in a home of different ethnic than me.

So are you saying that you don’t have social interactions because you worry about offending people?

I don’t have social interactions for that reason and because whenever I am with people I hear stuff and can’t tell if its them or voices --or like I think of it as echos. Sometimes i hear it on youtube but on you tube I can replay to see if its real in real life I can’t do that obviously

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I don’t know I just try to be calm an get along with people and somehow hope for better interactions

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Well obviously the voices can’t be controlled but do you think you can come up with alternatives to other problems you have? Like I had some problems as a kid being different than people too and it’s no fun, I applaud you for doing the best you can. So what I suggest you do is what I used to do: I just did the best I could and if anybody complained I just said I did the best I could despite how bad they treat me. And if it was a reoccurring problem I asked what they specifically didn’t like about what I was doing and I made an effort to change that .After awhile they began to appreciate that I was taking action to improve myself but all I was doing was what I was taught in school so I’m glad it worked out for everybody. My main point things like this are all about knowing the problem and find alternatives to them and then putting them into action.

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My guess is that it’s your mind trying to come up with an explanation for what you feel. The only way I’ve ever found to combat that sort of thing is to see if there are other people of the same race/gender/whatever around and if they are all being treated the same way. Usually it’s not the case. Usually for me it turns out to be a combination of paranoia, and then because I’m a somewhat eccentric and paranoid person in public at times, that is actually what might make some people look at me weird or something. My heritage is German/Irish and I still get some occasional weird, rude experiences in public. I think some people in general are just rude, and then there is also paranoia.

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That’s true. Sometimes you need to ask yourself if what I think is going on has any evidence that it’s really going on.

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Thanks for the replies

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