Little hope

As part of the process re getting help with cleaning my flat i had to do an assessment which was basically recovery star with a few additional random(?) questions tagged on.
Was asked about hope for the future and goals.
Basically said i had no goals and little hope of a brighter future. That it’s all about staying at the current level and not slipping rather than making any great advancement .
Maybe it’s a mixture of chronicity and age fuelling this weary, defeated resignation or just acceptance that it’s too late for anything to make much difference.
That there’s an optimum window of opportunity which for me had long passed before anything much was ever offered.

I met a guy who had a saying

How do you eat the largest cake in the world? One bite at a time.

I don’t think we can look at it as just a few steps and we’ll all of a sudden be so much better off.

I know I’ve become a large optimist these past few years, but when I was more realistic, I was happy not getting worse that I didn’t think of getting better. But you know, just one little degree of change today does impact where you end up later.

I do think it perception. For some just holding on doesn’t seem like anything. For others, just holding on IS the advancement.

I was really happy for you and impressed that you had a group of people over helping you cook and you always bring new ideas to the table.

“FUTURE GOALS” is sort of a big vague thing. Who can actually picture that? My sis has been getting me to focus on the what I do in the next few hours instead of what I do with my life. If that makes any sense.

Hope you have a lovely sunday and hope the weather is such that you can take a small walk and enjoy some spring air.

that is a sad outlook, it’s a beautiful Sunday here, take yourself to a beautiful church, hear some beautiful music, get outside, and start fresh tomorrow is Monday

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Someone said about thinking in tiny steps . I wish i could but my mind draws a blank.

I was talking to a priest a while back and he said something that has touched me. “God made you exactly as he had planned. You are exactly what you are supposed to be,” He is also famous for saying “God doesn’t make mistakes. And God doesn’t make junk.” Sometimes we have to see the small victories and let the big ones take care of themselves… My therapist is working on me to have goals for the weekend which is the hardest for me. I am very isolated and except for my two weekly visits to see him I do not interact with the human population all week. My daughter is 21 and is off living her life and rarely sees me. Today is mother’s day. I could look at the fact that my daughter is too busy to spend time with me or I can make plans for myself to have a productive day that won’t aggrevate the voices into action Try making a simple plan to enjoy the day and let tomorrow worry about tomorrow.

In Recovery we say “Part Acts. One day at a a time.” "Our supreme goal is our mental health."and “Fear of the permanent handicap.” Try making a friend. Not just a casual one. Smile and say hello to people you don’t know.
“Put a little love in your heart.”

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Dear Mr. Firemonkey,

I think a bright future is sort of a big vague thing. A series of good days is having the time to do stuff you enjoy.

If you don’t mind me asking, what do you like to do? What brings you joy?

Mainly i like to surf the net. It’s hard for me to think of anything that brings me great joy though. I feel negative emotions much more intensely than positive ones.

With all the recipes you have posted, I was wondering if you like to cook. My brother always copies down what you post.

I wanted to thank you for what you have posted. It’s given both of us options on cooking for each other.

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I also enjoy your recipes.

When i can find the motivation i quite like to cook. Unfortunately the cooking has stopped as they thought i was doing ok at it.

If your brother likes hot stuff here is a recipe i found.

Extreme chicken supreme

400 g diced chicken
Chopped red pepper
Packet of mushroom sauce
Cayenne pepper

Fry chicken and add cayenne pepper
Add chopped red peppers and fry
In saucepan add mushroom sauce and milk and cook until thick.
Add more cayenne pepper(optional) and add contents of frying pan to sauce

Serve with rice

Sausage casserole

6 sausages
Red pepper
Mushrooms(4-5 sliced)
Jar of sausage casserole pour over sauce

Bake six sausages in a shallow dish,pour over jar of sausage casserole.peel and slice potatoes,layer on top of casserole.
bake for 25 minutes

Stir fry

-500 grams of chicken breast
-basmati rice or anything you fancy, such as udon noodles,rice noodles etc
-vegetables such as bean sprouts,red bell peppers,carrots,red onion,mushrooms etc.
- clear honey
-dijon mustard
-soya sauce
-cooking oil - sesame oil goes best!


  1. Mix approximately half a bottle of soya sauce in a tupperware box, add around 2 tablespoons of dijon mustard and 2 tablespoons of clear honey.

2.Cut the chicken into even pieces and place it into the ‘‘marinade’’ for minimum 30 mins, in order for the chicken to soak up the marinade.

3.Start to boil the rice/noodles, in the meantime start chopping up the veggies.

4.Add oil to preferably a wok and fry the vegetables for around 5-7 mins.

5.Add the marinated chicken into the pan and let it simmer until the chicken is properly cooked and tender.

If anyone else has simple recipes please post them


@firemonkey Life is not easy for me either, I am trying to see the bright side of things in my life. You are a good guy with lots to be grateful for Im sure. You have a whole lot going for you, including intelligence and a good heart - Im sure there is a ton of other good qualities you posses

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my clinical psychologist says the same thing…
i don’t plan for a future, i am on borrowed time, i just take everyday as it comes and try and do something positive.
take care


Hey, I get hopeless every day too. Then something happens that cheers me up. My life is over every day, with no future. But then I get a modicum of relief and that’s enough. And then I kick myself for letting people get me down and making me feel like giving up.There’s a lot of really mean people in my apartment complex. But there’s some nice ones too.