It’s so much more complicated then life in my head. Life inside my head is pretty much the same everyday. It takes a lot of work not to let go and burrow back down into the deeps, like a clam in the sand.
But I’ve been working so hard not to live in my head. I do more not living in my head. I see more not living in my head. But many times it confuses me and makes me want to let go and burrow back down into the deeps.
Other times I feel like I’m holding onto the last branch that is pulling me out of the quicksand and if I slip, that’s it. I’ll be sucked back into my head with no way out and then the wax build-up will come again. Life will pass me by again, I’ll be semi- catatonic again.
So I am working on finding the strength to learn about the life outside my head, and yet still working to better know the inside of my head.
It’s a lot of space to work with.
