I have learned this from my life. I wonder if anyone else thinks it is true?
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It sure feels that way. Life is way too hard. I can’t deal with it. I feel like such a failure
It helps to talk about our problems here. What are your problems? Maybe I can help you find some answers. If I don’t reply right away, don’t worry. I’m busy preparing for my inner ear tumor surgery.
First of all, you are not a failure. You have taken the important steps of researching your illness, coming to this forum, and voicing your concerns. Mental illness is something that you battle every day and that is a profound achievement. It is somewhat of a relief to find people with similar struggles.
I like your avatar.
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I hope your surgery goes well! Thanks yeah I like my avatar too. I feel like I don’t really have much to complain about but I’m miserable anyways. I guess I’m frustrated cuz I feel like my twenties have disappeared on me due to this illness. Growing up for me sucked too. I’m just tired of life. I should be happy because I’ve got a second chance at getting a bachelors degree and a job as an accountant. I’m frustrated that I don’t have any relationships outside of my blood relatives. I can’t make friends on my own. I kind of made one online friend but he only says hello like on average four times a year and doesn’t really continue the conversation past a couple of sentences. I’ve at this point at least put getting a boyfriend on hold until I get my degree but I’m frustrated cuz I’m already 27 and still not married. My biggest frustration is my fear of driving. It has crippled my life almost as bad as the schizophrenia. I drive and have a license but I’m bad at it and in order to hold a job I have to be able to drive. My family thinks it’s all just in my head and that I can drive. I don’t know maybe they are right. I think about suicide every day and I wish I could just be happy. I don’t enjoy anything. When I’m doing my homework it’s just as enjoyable as playing video games or watching anime. Aside from depression and fear I don’t feel much of anything. I only talk about feeling like committing suicide to my psychologist. I rarely mention it to my dad, and the rest of my family thinks it’s something I’m past a long time ago cuz I went to a mental hospital about it like approximately three years ago, but it’s like whenever I get stressed out or have flashbacks of when I ■■■■■■up I think about suicide. The only thing that really calms me down is listening to Christian music which I pretty much do constantly. I wonder if I talked more often about my suicidal thoughts to my family if I would feel better but I don’t want to bring them down and talk about it unless I’m really serious about it though. I don’t want to be putting out false alarms all the time.
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Don’t worry about “Crying Wolf.” Your family will understand your struggles better if they know how often suicidal thoughts plague you. It will give them a chance to react, which I think will help you. I’m glad you’ve found something to dampen your troubles. I like gospel music myself.
Driving isn’t the end all be all of everything. I had a fender bender in April fortunately the guy drove off, so it wasn’t reported to my insurance company. Would you be too afraid to bike around town? Biking could help you get used to being out of the house and would give you the freedom to go somewhere like a coffee shop.
I don’t have any friends my age that I’m close to. I just live in the ether. You could possibly volunteer somewhere and work places are good for meeting people. Also, don’t count out your friends here. I’ll be your friend. Feel free to message me if you want to chat. I like coffee shops, shopping of all sorts, horses, cute goats, and a guy I’ve known (not Biblically) since I was 16.
In my late twenties I was all upset about being unwed too. Now that I’m in my thirties I enjoy being single and taking on life’s challenges with mostly only family support. I don’t have a degree yet either and I’m 33. School can be a life long pursuit that you savor. 
So in summary: hit me up!
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Yeah we can be friends 
I’m currently volunteering for the summer at a place where everyone is really nice. I’ve thought about getting a LinkedIn account and adding some of the people I volunteer for but I haven’t put too much thought into it. The place I work is at my dads office and I guess I could think of the people there as friends. It’s just that I thought of them as being connected to my dad instead of me though. I’m quitting my job in October and my last day volunteering is for the summer on tuesday. I have to be able to drive cuz I live in California. There’s lots of hills and most locations are too far to bike to. I’m hoping that school doesn’t drag on forever.ive been in college for 9 years now about. By the time I finally get an undergraduate degree it will have been 12 years!!! Although I was thinking about stopping at an undergraduate degree because I’m so tired of school, but lately I’ve been thinking about getting a masters degree in taxation since I’m not going to have kids and only maybe get married I might as well try for a masters degree but that would take an adotional 4-6 years cuz I’d be doing it part time while working. Idk.