I have read a thousand pages on the topic of forgiveness, and letting it go. But I still struggle with certain things at times.
After I broke my neck, about a year in, both insurance companies… My car insurance company, as well as my work insurance… Went to town on me. I was cut off everything and basically was going to lose everything and wind up on the street soon.
That would be hard enough, but with the trauma of the accident and resulting brain and spinal cord injuries, I was on absolute overload. When I was released from the psychiatric hospital after a 3 week stay, I asked my dad, and two of my sisters to please lend me enough money so that I could afford to fight the insurance company for 6 months on their own terms. I was told that was how long it would take to be reinstated for benefits. Otherwise, I was at their Mercy. They were basically guaranteed to have their money repaid, once the suit settled
None of them helped me. I think maybe that’s when my spirit finally broke. Everything got to be too much. My entire world was crumbling, and it just felt like nobody gave a ■■■■.
I struggle at times to forgive them, I like to think they simply didn’t realize how bad things were with the brain injury. But then, I know if the situation were reversed, I would have been there for any of them.
I didn’t realize forgiving was such a long and Winding Road