Last messages before they kidnap and kill me

My caseworker doesn’t believe in God.
I once saw a shapeshifter in a Hastings.
I dreamed I saw myself in my fifties.
I was taken to ward in a child molester van.
When I was in crisis, I saw a staff person stuffing her face with a pastry and it made me sick to my stomach.
Don’t worry about other people.
I’m too far gone to have hope.
Love y’all

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You’ll be fine if you don’t do something dangerous to yourself. The idea that people will kidnap / kill you is a delusion. You’re pretty far down that rabbit hole of thinking.

It gets better with good treatment. Please try a med adjustment.

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Some female above asked if I worked. Why do these people give s ■■■■ about my personal life?

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We’re trying to help you with as many suggestions as we can. Can we do something else? I wrote before that I hate change. Maybe you hate it too. But you have to change something in your life to get better. Change may sound scary or uncomfortable for you but not changing something in your life could be a lot worse.

I know you’re trying hard to ignore your neighbors and I know you try get out of the house when you can or and I know you go to crisis when necessary but you need to do more. Don’t do anything drastic right now, today is not the end of the world, it’s just another day. You may be schizophrenic but you still have choices. I know you’re not dumb so use whatever intelligence you got and get someone to help you sort all this out.

I’ve been in day treatment before, it got me out of the house and some of the people there were pretty messed up and low-functioning, including me. But hell, we were all in our twenties and thirties and we got to play charades, and go out back and play volleyball, and bake delicious lunches, and play ping-pong and have informal groups. It was just something to occupy our time instead of sitting in our own houses stewing over neighbors, or thinking how ill we were. In fact I ended up making a friend there who I ended up knowing for a year or too. So maybe you want to look into that.

People can suck and really make you feel bad but people can also be nice and make you feel good. Don’t do anything rash, @roxanna. We have all suffered but a lot of us get better and go on to do neat things. If this (me) naïve, shy, average looking guy can survive 8 months locked up in a psychiatric hospital while psychotic the whole time than you can surely survive too. I know you are trying but you have take some kind of action like finding a day treatment like I said. Good luck.


Thanks. I’m going to keep moving forward. Do the best I can. goodnight.


That’s all you can do. Sleep good. Good night.

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I pray for you that tomorrow is a better day than today. Sleep well, @roxanna, and may God be with you. I will love you always, and goodnight.


Sending (((hugs))) and affection your way @roxanna.

Lots of people here who care for you and worry about you.



I get really paranoid too. A couple of years ago I was sure that the CIA were going to stage a nuclear event in my country to create a pretext for another Gulf war, and that they were going to kidnap and kill me as someone who was predicting (and therefore reducing the effectiveness of) their plans.

I also wonder if there is a plus side. To what extent are symptoms good for me?

There is a Japanese symptom called “hikikomori” which means hiding in ones house. People who have social phobia do it, and almost never come out of their homes. But there is also a treatment called “Morita therapy” for people suffering from the same phobia, wherein they are forced to stay in their room, until they get so lonely that they want to see people, and reintegrate in society. So perhaps the “symptom” is a sort of auto-cure.

I find that when I get really paranoid, I get so scared that I stop thinking about the CIA or whoever, and just concentrate on the practicalities of life, which makes me feel better. So in a sense perhaps my symptom is a sort of auto-cure.

I hope Rox is feeling better.


The voices can really scare you into thinking all sorts of things and fear is what they are about. I’m not saying none of your statements are true because some of them may be real memories and some of them may be just delusions or dreams. Don’t put too much into dreams though. They are unlikely to come true or be real.

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