@everhopeful Thanks for that I guess I really am lucky. It’s heaven to have no voices or delusions.
@Pianogal I have ‘intrusive’ thoughts/fantasies abt taking drugs all day… I’m trying my best to keep clean but it’s a struglle. Imagine your ego telling you all day long (when you aren’t focused or in company). Take this, take that. Combine this drug with that drug. How nice wouldn’t it be if you went on a vacation from this stupid isht. Take some …, have some …, smoke some … I wanna die why not get high instead etc etc etc etc etc etc…
Anyway I did breathing exercises and went “swimming” in ice cold water. It’s better now. I’m trying to go on a path of martial arts and training instead of the bullisht. I need to learn to change mood naturally.
@NutsAboutU Yeah I’m impulsive, I used to ride on the outside of trains and stuff like that. Almost died once in between two cabins of a passenger train, ridiculously stupid.
@Aziz Yeah I think sz is scarier then suicidal thoughts, you can pull yourself together and get over it. But in psychosis you can hurt yourself or other people because you don’t realize what’s going on. I’m more scared of hurting other people then suicide. Btw I read a lot of your posts. I will light a candle for you man. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be knocked out in bed all day.