It was just 10 weeks of emailing

But she’s now an author for one thing. And there’s something in me, with visual ness, of the written word.

It seared my memory bank. (I even partially knew it at the time.) Because I printed her words, at my internship and showed her 4 years after the fact.

She’s in my dreams at night, more often lately, maybe because of all the macro news… ie pandemic stuff.

I like in me that I threw my hat in the ring… Can’t that grant me a plug into the social pipeline!?! I’m ready. I believe that men and women can be platonic (even in the face of all I have previously said or done!)

More heatedly, can’t I hold those I’ve kissed to a higher standard to bring me out of this lonesomeness?? The stigma? It’s like that sometimes in my headspace…