It’s sunk in, my cognition will never be the same

For a while drugs helped me to feel better. Until there was nothing to feel better from much anymore . I saw drugs not helping anymore so I started limiting them more. It’s kinda a double edged sword. Cuz now I sober up I can’t think straight. But at least I feel better and that’s more permanent. I’m OK with not being so sharp. It’s never what could have been. Never was considered by anyone to have much potential.
I’m more conscious now. But my neuroplasticity doesn’t result the same as it did. Doubt I’ll ever be able to think clear again. At least the pain isn’t so there anymore. I’d consider myself lucky. Always have been. You don’t get what you want you get what you need.

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I start weed rehab in an hour. I was going to ditch it and go to the dispo sand get more grass, but I haven’t done that.

For me it sucks how happy/productive I can be on weed. And for an extended period of time. My thoughts will have more of a direction to them when I’m smoking weed. But it’s just too consuming and I’m tired of it. I also can’t really afford it cuz I’m paying $125 for a half of shake. And it’s a lot of $$$ in gas to get up there.

Im doing 1 private session and 1 group session per week. It’s outpatient.

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I wish you great luck man.

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I hope you succeed, especially because it’s so expensive

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Sweet. Thanks.

1515

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I’m sorry you feel like that. I have cognitive issues as well and I don’t see much chance for improvement

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It is. They don’t take Medicare, but they do offer a sliding pay scale so it’s $30 each session.

2 of those a week.

That’s like $250 a month. Which is less than I’m paying for weed r n. I hope i stick with it

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You are off to a good start because you admit to having a problem. That’s a huge step toward recovery

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Naltrexone helped me for a while. When I mixed it with marijuana or psychedelics it seemingly got rid of that mental fog. Then I sober up and it’s a different mental fog. I’ve believed naltrexone to have restorative skills. There’s no literature on what it does for me. But I used to be stuck in a shrooms trip I couldn’t even speak. Now I can at least put 2 words together but I never can say what I want to do I take shortcuts in sentences. Use simpler words. I can definitely not use complex words

But before the shrooms trip my thinking was bad in a whole nother different way

I never liked the way I thought. I always thought it was bad thinking. Hence psychedelic drugs. Although they’re powerful tools. Never to be abused. I’ve made a lot of mistakes from the get go. just a matter of nature/nurture. . I’ve settled for being ok with this method of thought process.

I’m gonna go read jack Kerouac. I’ll talk to you later. At least I can comprehend reading now.

You give some you take some. But with addiction, and psychosis, you can never balance and have everything you want in your thought process. Just the nature of these illnesses probably. It sounds cliche but I really try to focus on the present and being happy now. And grateful.

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