It bothers me that Angie works so hard and I don't help that much

I do dishes, carry out the trash and sweep once a week to keep the fur off the floor. Angie works forty hours a week in housecleaning for a hospital…back breaking work really…she comes home at 1 15 am exhausted…I do my chores but most of the time I’m just listening to music and petting the dogs…I guess she is really grateful about me taking care of her dogs while she’s at work…we are very close the dogs and us. Rooroo gets so darned excited when she comes home.

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Don’t undersell yourself on your ability to take care of the dogs. That is a huge help. You also make dinner frequently. If you want to make sure she knows how much you appreciate her, try doing little sweet things for her more often. You already do tons of sweet things, but the more you do, the less guilty you will feel. I rub Mr. Star’s back for ten or twenty minutes most nights, and make his favorite foods. I may not be able to do much, but I do what I can to make sure he knows he is appreciated. That makes me feel less guilty that he does so much more than me.

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ahhh @Ninjastar you speak wisdom. my mother has wisdom…well answered !! yes usually I would bring home chocolates for her but she says no more candy! she is trying to lose weight…we eat a lot of cottage cheese. I drink V - 8 every day for my vegetables…I have lost 20 pounds in three months…now I weight 225. I really want to get under 200 !! I’m off track. I rub her feet when she gets home, I make sure she takes frozen food to work and her favorite dessert Flan. very handy food in my opinion…anyways, we take care of each other but she sure works harder than me.

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Those are such sweet things to do! And congratulations on losing so much weight! It sounds like you’re working hard enough to me.

I do isometric exercises in my arms too…my arms are getting toned again…I am on a roll…I haven’t been this close to 199 since 2004 !!

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Don’t feel bad Juke…

My wife works 40 hrs per week…I work 20. But I handle the pets, the garbage, the dishes, meals, the twins… etc.

I’ve tried to work full-time hours, but my creaky back and Sz left me sore and exhausted. I realize 20 hours is enough. With the pay I receive, I’m still contributing close to 30k per year which isn’t too bad.

Doesn’t seem to me like you’re taking Angie for granted. Endorse yourself for the contributions you are making, and realize you are miles ahead of most Sz sufferers and continue to look after yourself so you can in turn look after your significant other. :slight_smile:

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thanks @PatrickT yeah I guess I do support the family quite a bit now that I think about it.

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Maybe add one or two more chores to what you are already doing.

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My 80 year old Mom used to say to my Dad, when she was overwhelmed with housework and Dad would complain that something wasn’t done…

“Do you want me to shove a broom handle up my butt and sweep the floor at the same time as I’m making dinner??”

lol!

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Relationships are not about meeting at 50/50. Their about 2 people giving 100 percent. Your 100 percent doesn’t look like anyone else’s 100 percent. You do what you can. My wife doesn’t work and I work 40 hrs but it sickens me to think about comparison when it’s with someone I love so. I’m sure Angie feels similar.

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