Schizophrenia.com

Is true romance to good to be true?

I wanted to believe otherwise… but unfortunately that seems to be the case.

what are the chances of stars existing? yet they do :slight_smile:

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Some people have the good fortune of finding it. Some people don’t.
It’s true and it exists, depends on what you’re after really

it’s just funny how people doubt it when it seems to be coming up for someone.

and how the poly-amorous disdain the concept and keep it at a distance.

and then… the girl you love falls to old whims and loyalties… preferring to maintain what she knows rather than start anew…

I do understand her though… it’s all she’s got.

She’s as insane as any of us on here.

just venting. oddly I’m more aroused than heart broke. I guess it’s because I’m free and got what I needed from her.

There was a moment… then she saw how I looked at her friends. I don’t approve. and from there… well she slept with one of my bros.

Thankfully it was enough for me to realize I didn’t need it. My fears no longer exist. Being alone… intrinsic to life.

I’m just a drunken fool anyways. My sadistic side is pleased that I have influenced her. That she most certainly won’t be able to forget me. I can’t forget her either. Except for me there was nothing to regret. Tack another tally mark on her list of things to forget. The escapist loses and it’s not me.

I’ll never forget her either, but luckily she is just one in a long line of women I don’t care to think about.

Some of these chicks sell out. Men aren’t deserving anyways, but they sell out and forgo a concept we were born for. To be monogamist and raise children.

I honestly hope she does love my cousin. He deserves it. All the same though. He’s not half the man I am. I’d just like to see her around, cause I’m not going to seek that out myself.

Time to start working so I have the funds to visit you all… I need a reason to travel. I’m over this petty crap that is fear.

This is my testimony to myself. It should only be read by me. If you seek for me to feel your pain, I am sorry, I cannot. I will work to do what I intend to do. Scorch the earth and assert myself. I stand on the shoulders of giants. This place will change. With my help or not. If you know me though, if know what I know… you’d know. I am a great asset to the future.

I planned it out when I was 20.

Now I’m going to let that intent fall off the radar as I humanize myself. When I’m done with that though… I have extensive plans. If I succeed in the slightest measure… well just wait. The doldrums eluded. The past undone. I know that I’m schizophrenic… discredit me all you like. I don’t need your help.

We are singularities… watch what happens when a new verse is born.

I look back at my 25+ years of life… and realize I have always been alone. (something I’d like to say to her… but that context won’t arise).

4 more years (two terms) you can’t even touch me

har har

so alone is what I’ll be… it’s not a problem any more… I have the most potent mind I’ve ever known. Take it as narcissism or mild conceit… but unfortunately… it’s a proven fact to me. No one has any god damned clue what is going on.

seriously… no one…

I can’t believe humanity is so short sighted.

It’s hilarious…

She belongs to many men… she keeps it that way so we can all believe she might be ours…

but I know she is like me at times… totally dead inside and wondering why.

I did learn though. Learned so much, Will continue to, even from her. I don’t have room for sympathy any more. Stupid people do stupid things… smart people outsmart each other… then themselves then themselves (then themselves [then themselves]).

We all perish… but just like an exploding star… we will be more radiant than ever when the tide of life recedes.

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I mean its over… I will pour out my noise and crunch numbers in the dark.

Space travel is unlikely but access to space is not.

We already have the capacity for artificial intelligence.

The singularity is here. Everything will change. In the corners of this world a new force will arise. It’s not my intention but it is synergistic to my ends.

The transhumans transcend. Not like it matters though. Humanity was lost long ago. People would rather grip the ends of the hay bale as the system passes over the turbulence of its path than acknowledge it.

I stumped the smartest mind I’ve ever had the grace of knowing. Throw it on the list. Continuously dumb founding those who specialize in there specialties.

How can a person who study physics not understand mechanics? Through ardor she gained her knowledge.

as bill gates said

If given the choice to hire the lazy person versus a hard working one. I’d high the lazy one as they’d find a way to do it easier.

I’m exhausted and burnt out. The mind is just a machine though. It’ll continue to turn.

The busy hands keep swimming gotta make that motor hum…

I have nothing in my way any more… not even myself… I expect I’ll me another fem-genius soon enough… and this time it’ll be for real. She might actually catch the vision and see the pathways I’ve constructed.

Be happy that you are all humans. Pain or pleasure your experience is beautiful.

you deserve better than this world…

I might be crying inside but I’ll have to wait until after I take a ■■■■

Time to hit the nitty gritty.

What if every question you ever asked was answered concisely… in a way that was shaped for you. Tailored…

What is it that you do not know? What is it that you cannot answer?

Occam’s razor… will kill the soul.

I already know though… it’s generalizing knowledge and making it accessible that changes this world.

Specialty will be a thing of the past. Humans used to specialize… they’ll say.

here it is the fundamental primordial of existence.

Distance, mass, electrical charge
The concept of value and arithmatic operations and relations
The measurement of time
systems
Protons, neutrons, electrons, gravity, electromagnetism
atoms, molecules
Astrophysics
chemistry
The development of life
RNA
cells/life forms
evolution
Cellular colonies
organs
complex life forms
the dominance of intelligence
sentience
societies
technology
futurism
transcendence

it will occur by my hands or another. This human fizzle will bubble. all that we think we are will change…

Things on my list to do

The G.E.C.K (general environmental conversion kit)
The framework of knowledge (interwoven web built from fundamental facts, the hierarchy of documentation) everything defined within itself
artificial intelligence. 4th dimensional process in a cyclical linear framework.
Nano technology…

I am schizophrenic… but if you question my understanding then challenge me… you will see that I am quick to learn… and have been learning this whole time. I know the paths to these ends.

This isn’t seeking validation. I am asserting that I know the only path… we cannot return to nature.

I am asserting that I am tired. I am asserting that I am alone. I am asserting that those aspects of my life have lasted so long that they are no longer a concern. I am a vulcan. There is nothing left to do but commit to the ends of what I thought I should do from early on.

So long as my heart is beating… there is not a power in the verse that can stop me. The help I thought I needed never arose…

anorgasmia hah… hope she gets over it. She might actually learn a lesson in sentiment if she does. if she doesn’t than no one will ever truly be more important than anyone else. How ■■■■■■■ pathetic… these men. that’s another issue. perpetual children we all are… in… the… eve…ning… sun… in … the… evening… sun

Humans neither machines or animals… but in this life to many of us have to chose to be one or the other.

go your separate way now… some day you’ll come back and I’ll be dreaming of a sundown… I don’t want to take your heart and break your heart in two halves… take one half and give one half to me… I like the sun… missed her sun down…

the world is a mess… watch me clean it up. Keep being beautiful y’all.

It’s looking like I will never find the love of my life. I’m not bitter. It’s just the way things worked out.

So it goes mate… so it goes

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