So I didn’t grow up with my father. He lived in another country. I just reconnected with him when I was 18 but we didn’t really stay in touch. Then I got schizophrenia and I didn’t talk to him for over 8 years. Then one day he came to visit with my sister and then two years ago he started to call me like every two weeks. My question is it normal that I am nervous on the phone with him. Like I am 38 years old now living at home with my mom single and jobless and I just feel awkward and extremely nervous Everytime he calls. Is this normal? Like I have been talking to him for 2 years now. Why am I still nervous? I don’t know if this is normal behaviour.
He’s a relative stranger to you. It will take some time to get to feel comfortable with him. It’s like he’s your Father and all of a sudden, bam! you are supposed to have an instant relationship with him No. It takes time. I would be nervous too. Any reasonable person would be nervous.
Okay thank you for replying leaf. That makes me feel better.
When my uncle talks to me on the phone I get sort of nervous too.
I don’t know, it is like @Leaf said, he is a stranger to me and your father is sort of a stranger to you
it is perfectly normal I suppose
That’s 100% normal. Damn you’re practically a normie. Haha
Well 8 years is some time, but even one year my dad was gone, instant connection when we came around. I got friends like that too, sometimes years and years.
Yes! it’s like I literally have nothing to talk about! My life is so dull. I am not working and barely have any friends. I just feel like I have to struggle to find a conversation topic. And I feel nervous and awkward on the phone. I am just not a phone person in general. I barely ever talk on the phone except like every two weeks or so to him.
LoL lol thank you. I am just not a phone person.
I feel the same way. All I do is watch TV and go to groups twice a week. I wish it was easier to talk.
I am an extreme introvert. So any type of conversation is hard for me. And like the phone is so triggering because all you have is your voice and I really don’t even like the way my voice sounds lol.
I’m capable of talking it’s just I prefer not to. It’s a preference thing. That’s why I only talk to certain people. I’ve never ever opened up fully though. You’d have to read my mind to understand me then youd probably still be confused. I don’t even understand myself. My identity is interesting.
That’s the same for me.
I think maybe because I’m don’t remember him from my childhood and I didn’t get to bond with him when I was younger. Cause if I did it would be easier to connect with him.
Yeah but makes no sense, this family. Idk.
Yes I can understand that. With me, I just don’t like talking. And I don’t have enough practice with it. Like I don’t have enough social interactions due to unemployment and just being stigmatized with this illness, living at home in my thirties almost forties etc. I think with me it’s like a shame issue too. Like I just can’t accept this illness and myself also. Sorry I guess I am going to far with this lol.
What’s shame? Jk lol
I wonder if this has a lot to do with your mother.
Yes, I guess I just need to lighten up. You seem like a person that doesn’t really worry about anything.
I wouldn’t say I don’t worry about anything. It’s rare but it happens. Last night I was worried about China and Russia attacking Hawaii. Then that spun out to sk not having our back because they wouldn’t let us launch operations towards Taiwan after all we’ve done for them. Delusions!
World making episodes are not delusions.
I’ve lost all faith in you.