In my personal experience, for me, suicidal ideation is more about finding the pain of day-to-day life becoming unbearable and desperately wanting to get relief from the pain, than about actually wanting to die. I’m grown used to having suicidal ideation since it has been a symptom of my major depressive disorder. I’ve learned that for me these feelings come and go and I pretty much just ignore my suicidal ideation at this point.
It differs for everyone though and you definitely need to take suicidal ideation seriously and make sure your pdoc and therapist are aware of your feelings so that they can intervene as necessary. This is especially true if the feelings of suicidal ideation are new or have suddenly become much worse.
