cause my schizo friend who I hate a lot right now says that she felt better in one day after putting herself to believe in god. it was after her first psychotic break… the meds weren’t helping her(these are her lying words I guess) and she went to a monastery after what she felt asleep and ske has awaken up healthy… what a liar this ■■■■, she is just a ■■■■, I hate her so much right now!!!
She’s probably not lying, exactly, but just deluded herself into finding a “cure” that felt more empowering than meds. But obviously that kind of talk can be demoralizing and triggering for people like yourself, so it’s understandable why it would upset you, for sure.
It’s normal to recover slowly, it’s a process and you have to want to get better.
Stop comparing yourself to your friend, you’re clearly very different.
yeah but does she has the 15 years of tourment behind her? no she doesn’t… ill slap her face if I see her right now, I promise, she is a ■■■■■■■ whore…
Everyone is different Anna. Let her have her life and you have yours.
If you make a positive effort towards your recovery, the recovery of others won’t bother you. If you keep dwelling in the same thing over and over again, you’ll get disappointed because nothing changes in you.
It’s you that is important here, not your friend.
yeah, have my past and you will dwell too… 15 years of when you were completely alone? oh yeah… there is no such a schizophrenic like me, I never knew somebody who got 15 years of so complete loneliness…
Recovery is slow and when you are better and look at others struggling there is a temptation to get them from point A to point B quicker than you did. When I saw that my niece was having issues with being an introvert I feared the worst and thought a few choice words would turn her around. Well it doesn’t work that way. It takes time. I think she’s better than she appeared to be now by the way. Besides being an introvert keeps you from being overly committed in life beyond your ability to cope so it’s not the most terrible thing in the World. I am less introverted than I was but it took decades and I had to accept some difficult limitations in doing so.
don’t ■■■■ up with me blizzard. I am sure you haven’t had my 7 years in the eastern Europe psychiatry, nor the pedophilic which I had, nor the aggressive father, nor the ■■■■■■■ ■■■■ friend, nor the 20 years of total unhappiness ok? I really had 15 years of hell behind me… there are maybe only some prisonners who knew this… there is no a schizophrenic on earth who went so deep in the hell, ok?
It’s not a contest. And no one is trying to deny you anything or invalidate your experiences. This “friend” of yours is no friend and is a terrible distraction. I wouldn’t give her another moment of thought. You were wronged, horribly. I’m sorry @Anna10. You should not have had to go through what you did. You are obviously very strong and your recovery process is evident in that you are even still here. Everyone has their mountain to climb and you are doing well! As you pass people who maybe have attained their goal, don’t envy them that their climb wasn’t as far or high. You’re going to reach your goal too. Have you written your story? Sorry if you’ve said so before and I forget.
not I am not strong… my story is messed up in my head right now so there is no point to talk about it anymore… its without importance… this friend of mine is just a ■■■■… I hate her right now . I was too good to her for a long time…that’s all
its all just losted years…
Hey Anna - can’t know what you’ve been through but it sounds reeeaaallly horrid. You deserve the best. Thanks for expressing your frustration and emotion. It’s good to know and hear how you feel. Sure hope there’s some colour tomoz.
maybe it had like a placebo effect, I personally wouldn’t believe it since the only things I find are helpful is meds and therapy.
Yes yes and yes. I’m still recovering. Mrs. Pixel had to remind me I was in need of a shower this morning as I had forgotten for a couple of days and, well, she didn’t enjoy being downwind of me. Whoops. I need to pay more attention to the prompts on my phone.
It took YEARS for me to become functional enough to live on my own after first being DXed. Took me a lot more years to dump the worst of the anger about my childhood. Haven’t dumped all of it, to be sure. A lot of recovery is a ‘time takes time’ affair and I suspect I have more recovery in my life than I’ve been allotted lifespan for it.
I also think that a big part of recovery is learning about yourself. This will inherently involve steps both forwards and backwards … so long as you remember how to put at least one of your symbolic feet forward, you can always get momentum.
I try to avoid saying “lower your expectations”, so maybe a better alternative is “celebrate the small steps”?
For me, it could be just remembering to identify the signs that I am starving. The next step might be actually getting off my ass to go and get food and put it inside my mouth. I’m pretty happy that yesterday I managed to eat two meals without prompts!
Starving? Dear God, I wish that was contagious. I have to remember that I’m trying to lose weight and step back from the chocolate.
Oh trust me, it’s not a will-power thing. It’s just that the one med that I am still allowed to be on while I’m awaiting pdoc review is a med that dims hunger and I am, at the moment, pretty much completely unaware of what time is.
I have plenty of willpower, it’s won’t power where I’m lacking. Apologies to @Anna10 for the thread hijacking. Certainly not trying to make light of how badly you’re feeling. Hoping things start to look up for you soon. Sending hugs.
pff ok… but right now I still figure how I am gonna get my brain again… I didn’t made him work since 13 years exactly. I smoked weed in front of the tv with it… that’s all. do you imagine a life like this? weed and tv…I cant talk right now, I messed with my brain to this point yeah :(… now I have all these cognitives symptoms and they still make me feel like I am in hell… and yes, of course that I am envious of my schizo friend who didn’t knew this, the ■■■■… now, there is no boy that wants to be with me. I am mean and stupid and fat and ugly…
I don’t think you’re stupid and I certainly don’t think you’re ugly. Attitude and weight are both very fixable issues! They just don’t get fixed overnight. Maybe starting with working on your weight would help your self-esteem and attitude? I could always use more exercise buddies/budettes over at MyFitnessPal. Maybe we could motivate each other?