There is a person in my mental health housing who in my opinion, thinks that she is blameless for anything. She is a snivelling snitch addict sucking up to her friends outside the housing spreading gossip about other people she observes in this mental housing unit. When she invites them in, they join in a patronizing display of arrogance towards us with this person.
I told her many times to stop this behaviour. She never worked a single iota of her blood trying to earn respect from others. For 10 years. In fact, her narcissism and contemptuous personality had gotten so severe to the point that she instigates insults, lies, starts conflict, or tries to make me lose money when i travel to other parts of town where her friends may work. She thinks i dont care to stick up for her bc i am “immoral” in her black and white immature mind. It is actually because her overly snivelling entitled over snitching to her rich friends is all about her trying to depict her competition in the housing unit as bad people to look better.
I dont really understand why this person cant have insight into her conflict prone personality. She is entitled, paranoid, punitive, etc. During her work volunteer, she is lazy, professionally incompetent, disrespectful to my parents financially when they visit, etc.
And she merely wonders why i am a bad person to her. She uses her egoism to get in the way of being a good worker. In fact, she works for no one except herself and cuts corners at volunteer work.
I cant avoid her and i am stuck with her. She tries to give me relapses and it is financially very costly.
What should i do?
How would she make you lose money when you travel to other parts of the town? Sounds like you’re just weaving a paranoid narrative. Think schizophrenia.
Im not going to elaborate.
She is entirely patronizing with her friends and does strange things to make me realize how my family had fallen out of favor with good people.
Her crazymaking cant be possible without the help of others giving her the go for it. Its so publically obvious if a third person were to see it going on.
Anyway. I guess they will believe her but its a pity that they cant judge such poor character This excessively deliberately incompetent.
Hey @grumpy. Personality disorders are curable or at least treatable, but only if the person suffering from it has insight. With insight they can participate in behavioural adjustment programmes which will work on their attitudes and behaviour. However, if they don’t have insight, then unfortunately they are just going to continue their usual manner. What can you do about it? Well, that’s a hard one seeing as she shares the same housing as you. All i can suggest is that you try to avoid her as much as possible.
Is there a manager in your group home or other mental health worker who you could talk to where you then sit down all 3 of you and talk it out? That’s what I would try to do. Get a third party who isn’t mentally ill involved to help you get your points across and come to terms with each other. It doesn’t mean you have to become friends. In fact, I’d avoid friendship altogether. But you could become cordial with one another.
Thanks… i gotta avoid her or figure some way. I forgot to mention that from day one, with her patronizing, she likes to publically embarass all of us in the housing unit by snitching about our eating, bathroom, hygiene, bedroom, education, or social habits to her friends who patronize us. I think the faniliarity bred so much contempt that she cant control her impulses to engage in nasty power trip remarks or threats about withholding housing unit privileges.
I recommend that you move out and dont live with other people if possible. You have such a bad perception of them.
the basic idea is the personality disorders aren’t treatable.
In fact, I was diagnosed with two while in the hospital with psychosis. The psychologist diagnosed me with them to argue that I should not be placed on court ordered treatment as what I had was not treatable (one of the requirements of court ordered treatment was that the illness had to be treatable) vs. schizophrenia that is amenable to medication. Seemed like a sleazy way of going about defending me and not really in my best interest.
I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder. I resent this. I was told years ago that I could attend DBT classes to “cure” my personality. I asked my case manager why on earth would I want to “cure” my personality? It doesn’t adversely affect me! It only affects other people, supposedly.
Its okay… borderline personality isnt too bad. Its due to trauma mostly. Dont worry about that. What worries me is narcissistic personality disorder.
I’m confused, does this person actually have a diagnosed personality disorder though?
I think the person is an undiagnosed narcissist or antisocial. This person for some reason cant stand me rnjoying life or mentally improving anyway. Also conflict prone, and insulting for no reason. Has a huge rntitlement complex and downgraded my status to the lowest in the past 10 years. Someone who cant control their feelings of envy and watch others lose weight and grow as induviduals.
I think he might be miserable with his life and want others to feel the same way. He probably has zero insight as to why others dislike him… because he starts trouble sll the time and thinks its someone rlse fault rather than his poor character or integrity.
You do this a lot though. Dont you think you need to start treating other people a bit better?
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