When I went to the hospital on Easter, I was suffering from intrusive suicidal thoughts. I don’t think a five minute period Went by without me thinking about suicide and how that would have been a great idea. But every time I quickly told myself “noooo don’t do that”. But the thought quickly fired back at me. Before I was in the hospital I was driving and I had the urge to drive my car off the road but I didn’t do it. But the suicidal thoughts were very intrusive I felt? But then I went into the hospital and they raise my Zoloft and the suicidal thoughts went away . Also, the day I went to the hospital I also went to the gym that morning, to help my depression, but it just made it worse. So I’d say it was good I went to the hospital
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Thank goodness I have no thoughts about suicide, intrusive thoughts torment me and tell
me that a life of great suffering awaits me, but no thoughts of suicide.
I am willing to suffer, no problems for me in terms of willingness to suffer and carry on.
Often when my intrusive thoughts and voices tell me things I don’t like I try to resist them by repeating certain mantras,
but now after a sleepless night I don’t have the energy to resist.
But at least no suicide thoughts!
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Sometimes I suffer too, I hate my intrusive thoughts. I can’t go to certain places because I think people will bad mouth me. I hope for peace of mind.
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I’ve had those thoughts
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I’ve had these thoughts, my pdoc told me its because I have OCD. But by the same way these thoughts came other thoughts about keep me alive came too
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I get them too, I’m not wanting to die but it’s been that way for years now so I’m sort of desensitised. It scares me each time I act, I did so last while disassociated in January if it wasn’t for a passer by I may have lost my life.
You were sensible going to the hospital, what I did which may help is to write a list of the things you feel make or would make your life worth living (something to aim for). And have it on a card or a little flip book you can carry around with you then you can remind yourself of those things a few times a day or just when you need it.
I am glad the Zoloft is helping and that it continues as such for you
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I used to be on 200 mg of Zoloft worked great. Now im on clozapine. I can’t remember the last time I was suicidal it’s been a while
I’m glad you recognized you needed some help! That is a good thing in the scheme of things! It’s hard to do all this on your own and sometimes a helping hand is needed!
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