Improvement vs Rumination

I’ll give an example. I realize now that I never got good at communicating because my Mom wasn’t much of a communicator. I’ve gotten a lot better at that the last 20 years, and worked hard on it. That has been self-improvement

But then sometimes I still ruminate on everything that I didn’t get emotionally. I know this is the wrong way to look at things, but that sense still returns sometimes. How do I do something more constructive with that?

Tell yourself to forget it. That’s there’s not justification for it and that it just happened to be this way. Eventually you’ll preoccupy with more real and present scenarios and problems and won’t be bothered by it anymore - that’s what’s I’ve done with things I felt should’ve been a different way

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Most times I do just set it aside. But something tells me if it keeps coming back, there is something I need to learn from it. Otherwise you’re just repressing something, atleast certain things

I can’t do anything about the past, but I can see the effects on my life.still. what I’m trying to take from it is, how do I fill those holes now as an adult

I’m a little stumped. I mean, I have family and friends but I still feel empty inside sometimes, like there is something missing

I spend a lot of time ruminating things I’ve done wrong in past.

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I go there sometimes myself @Star84 . Not as often as I used to, but every once in a while still

My own little piece of the cross, I guess

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I understand. And I completely agree. Youre right, if it comes back. It’s like the worlds way of saying something needs to be learnt from it. That’s ridiculously true to me as well. Maybe we’re philosophically similar.

I think, the truth is. In the world. We really are never able to escape the fact that in the end of every situation. We are still just on our own. From start to end. We come and go as just one individual or soul. Maybe the missing feeling is a void created from feeling helpless about things beyond your control?

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You could be right. It just seems like there is a missing intimacy. I feel cut off at times. But then, I have lived this way most of my life.

I have had a lot of rumination over the years. I define it as small fragments of thought that branch to related topics frequently. In a way it is like worry. I do not choose to be this way, but that is what I get. Rumination fills my mind, but I think good thinking would be better.

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That’s a good way to describe it. Sometimes I get sucked into rumination, sometimes I can avoid it

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